Verbal

The N- word, the F- word, and the C- word.

I was walking my lovely German Shepherd Obama with a friend of mine who is from Mexico.  We were walking along the street where I live when a man started yelling at me through the window of the house we were passing. At first his words were too muffled for me to hear, but with incredible shock I made out the n-word as well as the f-word (the homosexual one) and the c-word.  Then he began berated my friend using many racist words which I am not willing to repeat to anyone.  This man looked completely crazy and with unkempt hair and stubble.  I am not sure what to do now as I was terrified by the encounter and have not been walking my dog since then.

Submitted by S.D.

one comment 
Verbal

Incest and harassment. A scary duo.

My friend and I were walking from class to my apartment one afternoon when we experienced a disturbing case of street harassment.  We were about 50 feet from my building when a homeless man nonchalantly said, “hey girls, my daughters are 25 and 28 years old, so you can imagine I haven’t had pussy in a long time. Will you please give me some pussy!”  Not only was this sexually explicit, but the man was probably in his late sixties and hadn’t seen a shower in months.  My friend and I looked at each other in shock and quickly sought the safe haven of my building.  The man parked his ass on the dumpster next to our building, which made us hesitant to leave the rest of the evening, not knowing whether he had left the vicinity.

Submitted by A.J.

5 comments 
Verbal

Holla’ing back makes impact!

I just read an article about the Hollaback organization and its founder in the NYtimes.com tonight.  How timely an article it is for me.  Recently, I was able to get a restraining order against a neighbor who had been harassing me off and on since the summer of 2009.  It was typical street harassment.  I’d walk past one of the two entrances to my building to hear him call out something in the familiar donkey bray I’d come to hate as other men with too much time on their hands stood around and watched.  I (unfortunately) live in Denver now, but I am a NYC woman who has dealt with this kind of harassment for most of my life.  I knew that eventually, I’d end it.  When I complained to the building manager and she told me that there was nothing she could do because “it happened on the street” and not on the property.  Was annoyed, but I was convinced I’d get even.  Stay tuned, because I did.

Well, one day (Feb 2010), it happened on the property and in a witness-environment.  So, I took the chance when I had it.  I hobble-walked (I had had foot surgery and was walking assisted by a cane) over to my harasser, confronted him eyeball to eyeball and told him with much repetition that it was going to stop here and now.  I told his male onlookers that they were my witnesses and I took names (they scattered like roaches under bright light).

Fast forward to September 2010.  My harasser saw me in the lobby and thought he would apologize.  I wasn’t having it.  Long story short, he got angry and came at me.  That really made me mad!  I called the Police and repeated to them one of the things that this fool had said – that the “Police won’t do anything to me” .  That night he got a visit from two police officers.  Two days later the Sherrif served him with a temporary restraining order.  Two weeks later he was standing before a judge.  One month later, he was standing before that same judge breathing heavily as the judge informed him that he had stalked me and that he would have a permanent (a second for him) restraining order placed against him.  Another week later he was visited by his parole officer (conviction – felony assault on an individual he drugged).  Two months later, I am still trying to get him evicted.

I can’t help but wonder how strong of a correlation there is between prior criminal behavior and harassment of women.  Or, if the man has no criminal history, is it a predictor of criminal behavior, although I understand that harassment is criminal in itself.

I think that this behavior will only stop when men make each other stop, but in the meantime, I will continue to hollaback as I have done for years.

I have even devised a cure for men who like to expose their penises.  Dying to try it on some poor Denver fool, but have not had the chance.  It will turn the table on the man so that he crawls off in total humiliation, just by hollering back.

Submitted by H.H.

one comment 
Verbal

The trauma of street harassment is very, very real

The summer 2005 was the happiest summer of my life. Little did I know it would be the LAST happy summer in my life.

I had dressed into hippie clothes, long green skirt and a flowery sequined shirt. I went to the library to lend a DVD and then to the shop to buy candy to accompany it, and I saw this man with a ponytail (take note; if you see an old scruffy man with a ponytail, it basically screams STAY AWAY FROM HIM!) but I paid no attention to him.

Later when returning from the library, I walked past him when he was sitting on a park bench. He glared at me angrily and grunted: “Nice tits.”

I was horrified, but I could not do anything else than flip him off. He flipped me off with both of his hands, called me a “fucking asshole” and started cursing with his face up to the sky that all women are whores.

Result? I was traumatized so much (and it was not the first and last time when I get harassed) that I became suicidal, and later I was taken to a mental hospital (where I was still harassed). I have been in the loony bin three times and I have been diagnosed with schizophrenia, bipolar and mid- severe depression. I still take medication for it, and every single fucking day I hear his voice, and all the other dude’s who have made my life hell.

Who said men are the superior sex? They’re the nothing but the things they describe women: attention whores.

Submitted by Miia (Pardon my English)

one comment 
Verbal

Revolted, Dumbfounded, Appalled, and Disguested

I was about to cross the street when I saw a scooter coming down the street pretty quickly, so I waited, thinking he would pass.  But then he started waving his hand, motioning for me to go ahead and cross.  He was still travelling at a high speed, though, and I didn’t trust he would slow down in time, so I continued to wait.  Finally he stopped, with his front tire in the cross walk and I had to walk around him.  But as I passed him, I heard him start to make “smooch” noises and I looked back to see him looking directly at me whilst continuing to “kiss.”  Appalled and disgusted, I just glared at him and said, “Don’t do that.”  Then he zoomed off.  I felt like I immediately needed a shower.  After the fact, I wish I had said or done something more aggressive.  But not being a UK citizen (I’m an American student), I didn’t know what I was legally able to get away with.  After telling my own boyfriend about it, he said he thought girls like getting catcalled.  I really don’t understand how a guy can think girls like that or will respond in a positive manner.  I’m revolted and dumbfounded.

Submitted by Emily

no comments 
Street harassment in the media, Verbal

Note to humans: dirty animals at Nostrand and Putnam

Perhaps the talented ladies at “Tell ‘Em Why You Mad’ just coined a new term for scumbags everywhere. Let’s raise some awareness about this global pandemic: CORNER BOYS.

“Hey! I want to suck your…”

JUST SHUT IT, CORNER BOY!

Enjoy the video.

Tell ‘Em Why You Mad Ep 004 Harassment from Tell Em Why You Mad on Vimeo.

one comment 
Verbal

Power Play

One of a gang of young men with hooded parkas smoking weed called to me from behind, I ignored them and kept walking. He carried on ‘EXCUSE ME?!, EXCUSE ME!?’ I thought maybe I’d dropped something, cos he sounded so urgent. I turned around ‘Yes?’ he said ‘how are you?’ they all laughed. I said ‘fine thanks’. He said ‘I like your knee socks’ I said ‘thanks’ sarcastically. they kept following me til I went through the barriers at Warren Street station. I’m not saying they had any intention of hurting me, I’m fairly sure they didn’t. Their intention was to dominate me, to intimidate me by taking up my time and assessing my outfit and entering my personal space, asserting their power over me. It isn’t nice. Sorry don’t have a photo, couldn’t even see them cos of their hoods. Just thought I’d share.

Submitted by Jennifer

2 comments 
Verbal

Scum of the bus

I had just gotten out of class and I was taking the bus home, and was already in a foul mood , then i notice this man looking me up and down and smiling. i felt violated, but chose to ignore it. until he started looking back at me talking. i took my ear bud out, and he said “how you doing” i said bad, and asked him to leave me alone. he then told me i wasnt hot shit, and that i wasnt even the hottest “piece of ass” on the bus, and i told him to fuck off, and he called me racist, i said “im not fucking racist, im just sick of being looked at as if im only an object fuck off”

i put my music back in, and he yelled at me, and i ignored him. this bus was not empty mind you. people just choose to ignore whats not happening to them. Fuck being harassed and feeling like shit because other people are scumbags.

Submitted by kegan

no comments 
Verbal

An otherwise lovely, sunny Sunday afternoon

group of awkward teenage boys on bikes with sagging jeans and flat-brimmed hats. Yes, i see you. yes, i walked past you.
no, i don’t need the commentary.
“nice ass!….small tits though!”
calling at me when i’m already past you? why don’t you want to say it to my face?
believe me, i am more than aware of my body. i don’t need observations made in public, on an otherwise lovely, sunny, Sunday afternoon.

Submitted by Danae

one comment 
Verbal

This city I call home

I’m a native New Yorker, born and raised in Brooklyn. I have been harassed throughout my life during train traveling and walking. I have had beer spat on me, due to my ignoring guys saying things from a car to me, while I was at a phone booth. A guy screamed on the train loudly “nice tits”. I even got propositioned on the L train for a threesome. I told the guy I wasn’t interested.

But recollecting, this has to top the list of all time. I was in my 20’s walking in NYC, some guy was walking next to me and tells me “he’d love for me to sit on his face”. I was so terrified. I just kept walking. What kind of human being would tell anyone that?

Submitted by Jill

one comment 
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