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Nonverbal Harassment, Story

Abby’s Story: On the Train

I was victimized horrifically by a subway sex abuser earlier this fall, on the E train during the morning rush. It was probably the most humiliating and degrading moment of my life. That day the platform was extra crowded because of delays, and so to avoid being late, I had to squeeze on behind this large African American lady. I barely made it on myself, so I was irritated when, as the doors were whooshing shut, this young man shoe-horns himself in behind me. His body was plastered against mine, and I could feel his junk crushed against my behind. But I thought it was an accident. When I craned to look behind me, he was a nicely dressed, pretty good looking white guy who didn’t seem like he’d have trouble getting dates. I figured he was probably even more embarrassed at our awkward situation than I was. So I ignored it – at first.

As the train rumbles along, and my butt bounces against him, he starts sprouting this huge erection right in the crack of my ass. Using the motion of the train as an excuse, he keeps poking it in as deep he could. I thought, I am being dry humped against my will in the middle of a bunch of people! Totally disgusted, I tried moving forward, but the big woman wouldn’t budge, in fact she elbowed me. When the train pulled into the next station, I prayed people would get off, but just the opposite happened. A wave of new passengers shoved on, and the pervert squashed against me even tighter. The train took off again, rocking back and forth, and it felt like I had a thick wooden broomstick wedged between my buttocks.

I thought of screaming, “Get off me, jerk,” but I was too embarrassed and didn’t want to make a scene. The next stop was in about ten minutes and I told myself I could stand it that long. Then, of all the freaking luck, the train STOPPED between stations for about 5 minutes. You’d think maybe this slimy creep would stop without the movement of the car giving him cover, but he actually became more aggressive, brazenly thrusting way up in between my cheeks. I was so shocked and paralyzed with fear, I could hardly breathe. And then the most horrible part. The vile piece of shit leans in and whispers in my ear in this creepy little voice, “If my girlfriend knew we were doing this, she’d kill me.”

That was almost worse than anything, because it made it sound like I was his partner in his sick act. The train finally moved again, and I guess my assailant realized I wasn’t going to do anything, so he just started POUNDING, very hard and fast. By this point I had my head down and my eyes were watering. I felt completely worthless. For all intents and purposes, I was being anally raped through my skirt. Well, I guess you can figure what happened next: He tensed up, his penis lashed around behind me for a few seconds, then I felt a wetness on my butt. I hoped it was my imagination, but when I got off the train and reached back, I was repulsed to feel the slimy gook. I hastily wiped it off with a Kleenex, but the whole time at work I couldn’t concentrate because I hoped no one would notice.

Later at home, I told my boyfriend what happened and he was livid. He said I “clearly” must have done something to “encourage” the bastard, and that if I wasn’t enjoying it, I would have stepped on the guy’s foot or screamed. His not being supportive is one reason I am having a hard time getting over this traumatizing experience.

I’ve spotted the nasty train molester 3 times since the incident. Once grinding another woman and twice just standing nonchalantly on the platform. The scumbag didn’t appear to recognize me. I guess I was just one of hundreds, maybe thousands, he’d used to relieve himself.

Published on November 30, 2015 at 10:33 am

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Story, Verbal

HOLLA ON THE GO: Sound System cat calling

Walking my dog at 10 o’clock, apparently the new things is to have speakers installed on the outside your car and a microphone so you can more anonymously make women uncomfortable enemy you pull up beside them and cat call, backing up slowly add we walk past. Uncomfortable enough that I went and got my boyfriend and you immediately felt scared off and decided to leave me alone. Leaving me wishing I had confronted you myself, because my martial arts training means I probably could’ve kicked your ass myself, but I don’t feel that kind of confidence.

Published on November 30, 2015 at 10:29 am

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groping, Story

Megan’s Story: Groped from Behind

Someone ran up behind me and forcefully groped my bottom while I was walking home. I have a stun gun but couldn’t get him before he skateboarded away. He was wearing a black coat with a camo hoodie underneath and the skateboard was black.

Published on November 24, 2015 at 11:25 am

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Story, Verbal

Mollie’s Story: “I see a lot of pussies here.”

While with a group of friends (four other women and four men), a male (wouldn’t call him a man) approached us and said, “I see a lot of pussies here.” He continued talking about our vaginas, so one friend and I screamed at him to leave us alone. Several strangers were around and didn’t help us out, but finally told the server at the stand we were at to call the police. The person harassing us continued to make sexual comments at us. He then began calling me fat and ugly and walked away, but not before I snapped a picture of him and shared it with my mother, who works with the Oakland Police Department. We were all angry and disgusted by this harassment.

Published on November 23, 2015 at 12:05 pm

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A Week in Our Shoes

Week in Our Shoes: Get Together Edition

Hello Hollas!

At Hollaback HQ this week:

We had an lovely lunch together with the youngest Hollaback!er Ari. He was wearing our Hollaback! shirt! Isn’t that adorable? Desiree, our HeartMob Program Coordinator, Screen shot 2015-11-20 at 3.05.29 PMis not in the photo because she talked about the growing and vital role of helplines in online safety at the Family Online Safety Institute Annual Conference “Risks. Harms. Rewards” in Washington, DC. CJ, our Program and Office Assistant, attended the Audre Lorde Project’s Trans Day of Remembrance and Trans Latina Network’s Trans Day of Remembrance. And Debjani, our Interim Executive Director, held another anti-harassment training in Council Member Lander’s District.

And at Hollaback! sites around the world:desire

Hollaback! Cuenca is having its “First Meeting Against Street Harassment” at University of Cuenca where they will present their first report on street harassment in Cuenca. They are also promoting Hollaback! on all 5 University of Cuenca’s campuses. Great job Cuenca!

Hollaback! Baltimore was tabling at War On Women event for the Transgender Day of Remembrance and attended the Transgender March of Resilience. 12238144_10156398650460045_4677048034052440949_oMoreover, on Dec 10th, together with Leaders of a Beautiful Struggle they will present “Gender & Police Harassment,” a talk exploring the relationship between police harassment and gender/sexual identity.

Hollaback! Croatia will be participating at the Equality Week organized for the International Day against Violence against Women, where different aspects of violence against women will be tackled with representatives from institutions, civil society organizations, academics, etc.

Hollaback! Belfast is preparing for the Reclaim the Night Belfast march to show the need for action against gender violence and harassment, part of the 16 days of Action against Gender Violence. We can’t wait to see all the photos from this amazing event!

Stay tuned for more amazing stuff next week!

Holla and out!

Published on November 20, 2015 at 6:20 pm

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