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A Week in Our Shoes: 1/27/12

BY EMILY MAY

Greetings Hollaback supporters and revolutionaries!

Check out this week ‘s HOLLAnews and updates with our latest installment of A Week in Our Shoes:

• International Movement Co-ordinator, Veronica Pinto and I attended MEN concert presented by feminist network Permanent Wave at 285 Kent Avenue in Brooklyn. As well as enjoying the music and sampling the bake sale, I was asked to speak about Hollaback and the revolution.
• I also attended the Manhattan Borough President’s Domestic Violence Task Force.
• Natalie our new intern started this week. In addition to supporting our work internationally, she’s working on development maps of street harassment for our local legislators here in NYC. We’ll set up meetings with them after the maps are printed — and hopefully get them to come and to the next street harassment hearing this spring!
• We’ve now got a fancy new donor database called Salesforce. AND we need help with both — check here for some pro-bono job descriptions and let us know if you’re able to help or if you know anyone who is.
• AND board member and founder of Mama’s Hip Hop kitchen, Kathleen Adams, is representing Hollaback! at a charity event Masquerade Noir Birthday Bash for DJ Mary Mac and LiKWUiD presented by pretty|UGLY NYC at the Silhouette Lounge in the Bronx this Saturday.
  

Thanks Hollaback! supporters for another fantastic week of fighting street harassment and keeping the revolution alive!

HOLLA and out!

Emily

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Published on January 27, 2012 at 6:07 pm

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Increase in Rape Reports in India Suggest Women Have Found Their Voice

BY CATHERINE FAVORITE

Last weekend The Times of India reported that the number of cases of rape, molestation and harassment registered with the Madhya Pradesh State Women’s Commission more than doubled last year, compared to previous years.

The number of rape cases registered with the Commission jumped from 62 between 2009-2010, to 141 between 2010-2011. Workplace harassment cases grew as well from 115 in 2009, to 268 between 2010-2011.

While this sharp increase in gender-based crimes is indeed alarming, Rashmi Sarawat, chief executive officer, Mahila Chetna Manch, offered some perspective and a slight silver lining to these statistics:

“At the same time, growing awareness levels helped more women shed their social stigma and come out in the open. More women are now aware of the Domestic Violence Act and Vishakha guidelines issued by the Supreme Court for workplace harassment. This may be the prime reason for more number of cases related to violence against women coming to light.”

It may not be easy to confront the real numbers of rape, domestic abuse and harassment survivors (in the United States, a recently revealed figure that one in four women will be raped in their lifetime has caused some commotion). Yet, the large figures not only mean that more survivors are beginning to feel safe enough to come forward, but that the public must pay attention to the crimes that all too often go unaddressed or are swept aside. With more attention paid to these numbers, comes more public outrage. This is the first step to stronger laws (or better enforcement of these laws) protecting women as human beings in both the public and private sphere.

Published on January 27, 2012 at 10:40 am

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HOLLAWho? Conocer Puerto Rico.

Meet Katsí Yarí Rodríguez, the fiery activist fighting street harassment in Puerto Rico.

Why do you HOLLA? Porque mi cuerpo necesitaba hablar de este tipo de situaciones como parte de un proceso de sanación y reconciliación. La memoria que mi cuerpo ha ido generando a partir de estas situaciones de acoso ha limitado mi manera de transitar en confianza en la ciudad y para sanar tenia que hablar.

What’s your craft? La investigación cultural con un enfoque de género y violencia. Creo que es urgente pensar la violencia rompiendo con algunos prejuicios y categorías que limitan nuestro alcance ante la complejidad de lo vivido.

What was your first experience with street harassment? Creo que a los 12 años. De hecho una de las cosas que más me impresiona sobre este tipo de situaciones de acoso es la manera tan detallada en que el cuerpo recuerda. Recuerdo la ropa que llevaba yo puesta, la sorpresa al recibir ese tipo de acercamiento y la sensación de miedo e inseguridad al enfrentarlo.

Define your style: Me gusta reflexionar desde la experiencia de mi cuerpo sobre la complejidad de un problema político –ético como éste y enfocar la reflexión a la reconciliación con nuestros cuerpos y las maneras en que queremos llevarlos.

Say you’re Queen for the day.  What would you do to end street harassment? Más que tipificarlo como delito, trabajaría con educación ciudadana y violencia de género. Además de generar mayores espacios de encuentro y no aislamiento. No creo que el problema se resuelva a largo plazo dividiendo los lugares en espacios para un género y otros para otro.

If you could leave the world one piece of advice, what would it be? Reflexionar sobre la vulnerabilidad como punto de partida ético.

In the year 2020, street harassment … debe ser trabajado desde la gestión publica con mayor seriedad y urgencia.

Published on January 25, 2012 at 12:00 pm

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Times India Features Hollaback! Chennai

Check out this awesome article published today in the Chennai Times. Reporter Rehna Abdul Kareem investigates Hollaback! Chennai’s bold new venture to stamp out street harassment.

Published on January 23, 2012 at 12:15 pm

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A Week in Our Shoes: 1/20/22

BY EMILY MAY

Greetings Hollaback supporters and revolutionaries!

This is the third installment of our blog series that keeps you up to date on HOLLAnews and our endeavors to stamp out street harassment. Here’s a glimpse of what happened this week in HOLLAworld.
- We held our first site leader training webinar for our new Hollaback! Leaders in Brussels, Belgium; Edmonton, Canada; Halifax, Nova Scotia, San Fransisco, California; and Portsmouth in the UK.

- Hollaback! Boston attracted the attention of the Jamaica Plain Gazette. Click here to read the article.

- International Movement Co-Ordinator Veronica Pinto, visited the Barnard College Careers fair to represent Hollaback! and scout some new blood for the revolution.

- Lastly, we extend a warm and excited HOLLAwelcome to International Movement intern Natalie and Thought Leadership intern Catherine.

Thanks Hollaback! supporters for another fantastic week of fighting street harassment and keeping the revolution alive.

HOLLA and out!

Emily

Published on January 20, 2012 at 5:38 pm

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“Gay Panic” and “Trans Panic”: Not a Worthy Excuse for Murder

BY VICTORIA TRAVERS

An ambiguity in Queensland law in Australia allows individuals accused of murder to claim a defense known as “gay panic” to avoid prosecution.

Confused? Guffawing slightly because it’s so ridiculous you can’t believe that this is not an elaborate hoax? You are not alone. More infuriating is that the “gay panic” and “trans panic” defense is not an unusual excuse for some of the most horrific crimes in history.

“Gay Panic” is the subject of a recent change.org petition, which relates to a murder that took place two years ago in Queensland. A man was murdered in the grounds of a church and his attackers were acquitted of murder following a “gay panic” plea.

Also referred to as “homosexual panic” and “Kempf’s disease”, the term was first coined by psychiatrist Edward in 1920 to describe a brief psychosis suffered by targets of unwanted gay attention. Luckily and quite rightly, the defense often fails and has been ruled inadmissible in many juristictions because of a complete lack of scientific evidence. Of course there’s a lack of scientific evidence, it’s as ridiculous as dunking a woman in a river to see if she’s a witch.

In a closer look into the history of “gay panic” I was staggered to learn of some of the horrific crimes committed where this defense has lessened prison sentences. In 1995, Jonathan Schmitz was tried for the murdered of friend Scott Amedure, who admitted on “The Jenny Jones Show” that he had romantic feelings for Schmitz. A week after the admission, Schmitz bought a gun, went to Amedure’s home and shot him twice in the chest. Schmitz claimed diminished responsibility citing “gay panic”, claiming that the humiliation and anger provoked by Amedure’s confession drove him to kill. Schmitz was found guilty of second-degree murder. First degree murder is characterized by premeditation, despite taking a week to murder Amedure, Schmitz actions were found to be unplanned.

Then in 2004 “trans panic” was used in the ghastly murder of transgender teenager Gwen Araujo in California. Two of her attackers were convicted of second-degree murder, but not convicted on the requested hate-crime enhancements. The other two men pleaded guilty to voluntary manslaughter. Despite being regarded as a “mostly” irrelevant defense it needs to be made simply a prohibited defense.

So do something awesome today to help your fellow man and sign this petition to urge “Queensland parliament and LNP leader Campbell Newman to eliminate this law as a partial defense for murder, and forbid non-violent homosexual advance being treated as evidence in any murder trial.” So far the petition has 21,874 signatures, but they need 25,000. So get clicking HOLLArevolutionaries, let’s reject these archaic values that condone prejudice and violence against LGBTQ individuals.

 

Published on January 20, 2012 at 1:45 pm

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Article

Dr. Vajayjay’s! Privatize Those Privates!

BY REBECCA KATHERINE HIRSCH

Confused? Excited? Don’t worry. Dr. Vajayjay can fix that.

The New View Campaign has put together a parody training video as part of its Vulvanomics activist event.

In this video, we see an enterprising, unscrupulous, nominal doctor capitalizing on externally-created insecurities, sexualizing genital mutilation and effectively pathologizing female sexuality. His bumbling assistant Steve sees the truth but is powerless to stop the charlatan, money-hungry Dr. Vajayjay. Meanwhile, nameless female prop character is kept in the dark, the pawn in the doctor’s get-rich-quick scheme.

“Dr. Vajayjay does not solve problems; he makes the most of them.”

What most interests me about labiaplasty and “cosmetogynecology” is how easy our contemporary culture makes it for such corporatized quack medicine to succeed: Our puritanical lack of honest, pleasure-based sex education coupled with the preponderance of sexualized advertisements (which rigidly define attractiveness and sexuality in terms of white, nubile teenage girls) makes it easy to manufacture discontent and stigmatize the ignorant masses into believing they’re deficient.

What is normal anyway? Genital diversity, like all manner of physical, racial and gender diversity is sorely lacking in mainstream media. In a rigid, capitalistic-at-all-costs culture, it’s easy to create unnecessary insecurity about what is deemed “normal,” especially when sexuality, women and female genitalia are so regularly and unremarkably criticized and scapegoated. With the help of female genital surgery, “naughty, nasty” vulvas, Dr. Vajayjay purports, can be turned into generic, prepubescent-looking “normal” vulvas, hence instantly achieving for their owners utter sexual, interpersonal, creative and self-actualized happiness. Right?

But doesn’t genital surgery remove sensitive tissue? Aren’t doctors co-opting scientific and feminist language to assume the mantle of legitimacy, then sexing it all up as “what women want”?

Sure they are. Welcome to America!

New View Campaign is a grassroots network that challenges the medicalization of sexuality through song, dance, and— well, mostly the written word and various activist/art projects. Founder Leonore Tiefer was featured widely in the muckraking documentary Orgasm, Inc.

Published on January 19, 2012 at 8:36 pm

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Article

HOLLAWho? Meet Birmingham.

Meet Zoe, the environmental advocate fighting street harassment in Birmingham, UK.

Why do you HOLLA? I HOLLA because I’m sick of half the population being objectified and harassed in every sphere of their lives. Because street harassment is totally accepted and hardly ever confronted. Because this needs to change!!

What’s your signature Hollaback? Leave me alone. Go away. Ocasionally fuck off – but I wouldn’t recommend this!

What’s your craft? I’m currently working for a small development NGO/charity in Chintsa, South Africa for the next few months – but still running Hollaback Birmingham and will be back! I plan to spend my life working within the women’s rights arena.

HOLLAfact about your city: Birmingham has more canals then Venice! Also despite being the second largest city in the UK, it has no rape crisis center.

What was your first experience with street harassment? Probably when I was about 13 years old walking to the local shop with my friend. A large group of boys, between about 10-20 years old, starting cat calling and shouting: ‘hey gorgeous, oi sexy, suck my cock, come on give me a bit of head, stuck up bitch.’ I just ignored them and walked away quickly. They proceeded to get louder and more abusive, and finally started throwing glass bottles, they all smashed pretty close to us but luckily none of them hit us!

Define your style: I basically dress like I’m constantly at a music festival. Think summery dresses and shorts no matter the weather (just add tights!). I struggle to dress smart and I never wear trousers!

What do you collect? Passport stamps and bunting!

My superheroine power is… surviving on very little money!

Say you’re Queen for the day.  What would you do to end street harassment? I think that the key is education and awareness. I would definitely make feminist issues, including street harassment, part of the curriculum in schools. Boys need to learn from an early age that this is not acceptable and not a route they need to go down to live up ideals about masculinity. Girls need to understand that their value does not lie in their perceived attractiveness and that harassment is not acceptable and never their fault.

In turn, the general public needs to be made aware of what a big problem street harassment is and how it makes women feel. I would start an advert campaign on the T.V, radio, billboards, and every other medium possible to highlight the issue and to open up a dialogue about street harassment.

If you could leave the world one piece of advice, what would it be? The world’s resources aren’t infinite and are going to run out. Climate change is real. We need to wake up and realize that we are destroying the planet before it’s too late, and it very nearly is.

In the year 2020, street harassment … will be recognized as a totally unacceptable form of gender based violence.

What inspires you? People who risk their lives and reputation for what they believe in, who fight for an ethical right despite threats, bribes and social/political pressure. Who believe the cause they fight for is more important than their own individual experience. The fact that nothing has ever changed without people taking a personal responsibility to push for it and that we are all capable of making a difference. In the words of Margaret Mead ‘Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.’

Published on January 18, 2012 at 12:00 pm

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Article

Martin Luther King, Jr. Six Steps of Nonviolent Social Change

BY VICTORIA TRAVERS

Today we take a moment to commemorate, salute and remember legendary figure of liberty and nonviolent change, Martin Luther King, Jr. All over the world King is hailed as one of civilization’s most significant figures of freedom, justice and equality. Until his death on April 4 1968, King was committed to the fundamental change of America via non-violent activism. Among many of his achievements, in 1964 Martin Luther King, Jr. was the youngest person ever to win the Nobel Peace Prize. During his acceptance speech in Oslo he made one of the most powerful and repeated remarks in History:

“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right temporarily defeated is stronger than evil triumphant.”

King’s focus on inspiring nonviolent activism to attain positive social change has inspired millions all over the globe. And we at Hollaback! are particularly inspired by Dr. King’s awesome legacy. King realized that racism, among other contentious issues, in America could not be altered “without radical changes in the structure of our society.” And we at Hollaback! know Street Harassment can only be eradicated with the alteration of deep-rooted social values and norms.

So we look to Dr. King’s Philosophy to strive for social change on the topic of Street Harassment. Dr. King developed this sequential process of peaceful conflict-resolution:

 

1. Information Gathering – The way you determine the facts, the option for change, and the timing of pressure for raising the issue is a collective process.

2. Education – The process for developing articulate leaders, who are knowledgeable about the issues. It is directed toward the community through all forms of media about the real issues and human consequences of an unjust situation.

3. Personal Commitment – Means looking at your internal and external involvement in the nonviolent campaign and preparing yourself for long-term as well as short-term action.

4. Negotiation – Is the art of bringing together your views and those of your opponent to arrive at a just conclusion or clarify the unresolved issues, at which point, the conflict is formalized.

5. Direct Action – Occurs when negotiations have broken down or failed to produce a just response to the contested issues and conditions.

6. Reconciliation – Is the mandatory closing step of a campaign, when the opponents and proponents celebrate the victory and provide joint leadership to implement change.

 

Be inspired. Join the revolution.

Published on January 16, 2012 at 11:11 am

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Turkish Gay Honor Killing Drives Inspirational Movie

BY VICTORIA TRAVERS

Turkish film, “Zenne Dancer” or male “belly dancer” in English, has not only received 5 Golden Orange Awards at the International Antalya Film Festival, opened the first gay film festival in the Turkey, but it is the first feature film to depict gay honor killing in Turkey.

The film, which is out on general release in Turkey today, reveals a deep-rooted hysteria in relation to gay, lesbian and transgender persons throughout the country. The creators said that they hoped the film would raise awareness of the issue and force a discussion across Turkey about hate crimes that target gender, religion, sexual identity and ethnicity. Binay told CNN:

“Death and murder is still on the agenda of our country. We can’t get rid of this mentality… People need to tolerate each other. They need to understand that different identities can live next to each other without disturbing each other.”

The film comes at a time when the Turkish Constitution is being rewritten. Currently article 17 of the health regulations of the Turkish Armed Forces states that being gay is a “psychosexual deviance.” LGBT activists are lobbying the Turkish authorities to alter the specifics of the constitution to protect the rights of LGBTQ people.

Check out the trailer here:

Published on January 13, 2012 at 5:27 pm

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Police chief accused of sexually assaulting her officers (Paso Robles, CA)

Law enforcement officers have names for the girls offering them sex on the beat: Badge Bunny. Holster Sniffer. Uniform Jumper. Handcuff Hugger. In Paso Robles, brethren in blue have one more: The Chief. A flurry of complaints and mounting formal grievances alleging sexual misconduct, illegal management practices and retaliation have been lodged against Paso Robles’ first female chief of police, Lisa Solomon. Those known to have made accusations against the chief include five current and former police officers, as well as a growing record of non-sworn police department personnel. The criticisms against Solomon include allegations of sexual assaults, many committed in the presence of others, repeated affairs with a list of subordinates, and bearing a child out of wedlock fathered by a former lieutenant in the department. ... Read More: http://calcoastnews.com/2012/01/police-chief-accused-of-sexually-assaulting-her-officers/

Published on 2012-01-27 21:37:54

Protests Around the World: Street Harassment in Malawi

Hastings Kamuzu Banda, a former dictator of Malawi, banned women from wearing shorts skirts and pants from the years of 1963 to 1994. While this ridiculous law ended eighteen years ago, there have been repercussions in this African nation. According to The Washington Post, men in the mainly southern parts of Malawi have been stripping women of their skirts and pants. The article states, “strains of conservatism remain in the impoverished, largely rural nation. Some of the street vendors who have attacked women in recent days claimed it was un-Malawian to dress in miniskirts and pants. Some said it was a sign of loose morals or prostitute.” However, women are not submitting to these degrading and humiliating acts of aggression. On January 20^th, about 3,000 Malawi women went to the streets to protest against the harassment.  They wore shirts denouncing the street vendors, chanted as they walked down the streets together, and demanded that they are treated fairly. CNN quotes Executive Director of The [Malawi] National Women ‘s Lobby Group Faustace Chirwa who said, “like a lot of Africa, there is a culture of instilling fear in women because people know they are voiceless even though they are guaranteed equality on paper.” Fortunately, the Malawi President Bingu wa Mutharika has sided with these women and condemned the attackers as well as promised consequences for these appalling actions. It is important to hear the stories of women in other countries, especially because we are all working for the same goals: equality and safety. The thousands of women that came out on Friday to express their desire for these goals are the reason why our movement is so important. Who thinks some of the protestors would be the perfect creators of the Malawi chapter of Hollaback?

Published on 2012-01-27 18:52:39

A Week in Our Shoes: 1/27/12

BY EMILY MAY Greetings Hollaback supporters and revolutionaries! Check out this week ‘s HOLLAnews and updates with our latest installment of A Week in Our Shoes:

• International Movement Co-ordinator, Veronica Pinto and I attended MEN concert presented by feminist network Permanent Wave at 285 Kent Avenue in Brooklyn. As well as enjoying the music and sampling the bake sale, I was asked to speak about Hollaback and the revolution.
• I also attended the Manhattan Borough President’s Domestic Violence Task Force.
• Natalie our new intern started this week. In addition to supporting our work internationally, she's working on development maps of street harassment for our local legislators here in NYC. We'll set up meetings with them after the maps are printed -- and hopefully get them to come and to the next street harassment hearing this spring!
• We've now got a fancy new donor database called Salesforce. AND we need help with both -- check here for some pro-bono job descriptions and let us know if you're able to help or if you know anyone who is.
• AND board member and founder of Mama's Hip Hop kitchen, Kathleen Adams, is representing Hollaback! at a charity event Masquerade Noir Birthday Bash for DJ Mary Mac and LiKWUiD presented by pretty|UGLY NYC at the Silhouette Lounge in the Bronx this Saturday.

Thanks Hollaback! supporters for another fantastic week of fighting street harassment and keeping the revolution alive! HOLLA and out! Emily              

Published on 2012-01-27 18:07:27

Invitaciones que asustan

Unos amigos y yo fuimos a una plaza y cuando entramos en el cine, una de mis amigas llegó y nos dijo que a la entrada de la sala un señor la observó por un rato y la invitó a sentarse junto a él.

Published on 2012-01-27 15:37:25

Hollaback! Istanbul in Time Out Istanbul

Interview with Kacie Kocher, Hollaback! Istanbul founder in Time Out magazine from October 2011. TimeOutIstanbul.Eng.Oct2011

Published on 2012-01-27 11:22:40

Increase in Rape Reports in India Suggest Women Have Found Their Voice

BY CATHERINE FAVORITE Last weekend The Times of India reported that the number of cases of rape, molestation and harassment registered with the Madhya Pradesh State Women's Commission more than doubled last year, compared to previous years. The number of rape cases registered with the Commission jumped from 62 between 2009-2010, to 141 between 2010-2011. Workplace harassment cases grew as well from 115 in 2009, to 268 between 2010-2011. While this sharp increase in gender-based crimes is indeed alarming, Rashmi Sarawat, chief executive officer, Mahila Chetna Manch, offered some perspective and a slight silver lining to these statistics: "At the same time, growing awareness levels helped more women shed their social stigma and come out in the open. More women are now aware of the Domestic Violence Act and Vishakha guidelines issued by the Supreme Court for workplace harassment. This may be the prime reason for more number of cases related to violence against women coming to light." It may not be easy to confront the real numbers of rape, domestic abuse and harassment survivors (in the United States, a recently revealed figure that one in four women will be raped in their lifetime has caused some commotion). Yet, the large figures not only mean that more survivors are beginning to feel safe enough to come forward, but that the public must pay attention to the crimes that all too often go unaddressed or are swept aside. With more attention paid to these numbers, comes more public outrage. This is the first step to stronger laws (or better enforcement of these laws) protecting women as human beings in both the public and private sphere.

Published on 2012-01-27 10:40:37

Burası Matrix Değil!

Kozmetik, çikolata ve kek reklamlarının çoğunda göz alıcı ve oldukça zayıf ve güzel kadınların kullanıldığına hiç dikkat ettiniz mi? Göz alıcı güzellikte bir kadının elinde parlak bir ruj tutması ve kameraya çekici mavi gözleriyle seksi bir şekilde bakması size tanıdık geliyor mu? Kek ve çikolata reklamlarının çoğunda gençler sanki bu ürünlerin sürekli bağımlısıymış gibi bu ürünleri yiyorlar ancak hepimiz biliyoruz ki bu tür şeyler sürekli yendiğinde kilo aldırır veya sivilce çıkarır fakat bu reklamlarda oynayanlar oldukça zayıf ve güzeller. Medya güzellik, zayıf ve çekici bir dış görünüm gibi unsurları kullanarak insanların ilgisini çekmeye çalışsa da gerçekte bu tür unsurlara sahip değildir. Bu göz alan bayan veya erkekleri oluşturmak için sanal dünyadan yardım alırlar. Genellikle photoshop veya arka planı ve renkleri değiştirmeye izin veren özel programlar kullanırlar. Birkaç modifikasyon veya değişiklikten sonra mükemmel güzellikte ve incelikte kadınlar ve erkekler yaratırlar. Buna ek olarak gerçek ve sanal dünyanın karışımı olan bu mükemmel yaratıklar gibi olmaya çalışan ve çoğunlukla genç yaş grubunda olan bir kamuoyu oluştururlar. Bu mükemmel modelleri örnek olan genç nesiller daha ince, daha güzel olmaya çalışmak için enerji harcar ve hiçbir zaman istediklerine ulaşamazlar. Yeme bozukluğu olarak bilinen anoreksiya ve dış görünümü nedeniyle depresyona giren gençler bu olayın en trajik sonuçları arasında gösterilebilir. Bir kadın olarak medyanın bana oyuncak bir Barbie bebek gibi süper ince ve süper güzel olmam gerektiğini empoze etmesine karşı çıkıyorum. Medyanın yarattığı bu modellerin gerçek dünya ile ilgisi kesinlikle yok, bunlar gerçek ve sanal dünyanın karışımı sonucu oluşmuş ve gerçekte ulaşılamayacak yaratıklardır. Sanal ortamda yaratılan şeylere gerçek dünyada asla ulaşamayacağımızın farkında olmamız gerek. Burası Matrix değil! Sevgiler, Cansu Uğur Konuyla alakalı satirik bir video "Fotoshop"  

Published on 2012-01-27 00:23:42

למה בכלל אני מאשימה את עצמי בהתנהגות שלו?

אני מרגישה קצת בחילה ואני לא מפסיקה לחשוב על זה. זו לא פעם ראשונה שמישהו מטריד אותי אבל הפעם קשה לי לפטור את זה מעליי. שבוע שעבר הגעתי לתל אביב במסגרת העבודה שלי. אחרי שסיימתי, החלטתי לקפוץ לאחת החנויות החביבות עליי ולראות מה חדש. אני מכירה את המוכר מהפעמים הקודמות שהייתי שם והוא תמיד היה נחמד. בפעמים הקודמות תמיד הגעתי עם חברות והפעם הייתי לבד כי הייתי צריכה קצת "טיפול בקניות". הפעם המוכר נצמד אליי ואני, שבכלל לא חושבת על זה, לוקח לי זמן לקלוט שמתחילים איתי. זזתי קצת אחורה. זה גם נראה לי בהתחלה שאני קצת מגזימה, כי הייתי בטוחה שהמוכר הזה לא ממש בקטע של בנות וגם אף פעם לא היה קטע כזה, אפילו ברמז, בפעמים הקודמות שהייתי. הוא גם יודע שאני נשואה עם ילדים. הוא נצמד שוב וגם העיר משהו על היופי שלי וכאלה ואז נפל לי האסימון סוף סוף. אמרתי לו שזה לא לענין והוא התרחק. אני הסטתי את השיחה לבעלי והילדים כי בד"כ משתמשת בזה כאיתות להתרחק ממני. אבל הוא לקח את הנושא לכיוון של לשאול בצורה קצת עקיפה אם אי פעם בגדתי בבעלי. הבהרתי לו שזה לא לענין והוא קלט ואח"כ אני הלכתי בלי מהומה. אבל עבר כבר כמעט שבוע ואני עדיין חושבת על זה. אפילו לא התחשק לי להוציא את הבגדים שקניתי באותו יום מהשקיות. אני מרגישה מטומטמת. גם בגלל שאני מרגישה תמימה ומפגרת שאני לא קולטת את הרמזים האלה. אני בת 30, מתי אני אתחיל לקלוט מתי גברים מתחילים איתי? הוא כנראה הבין שאני לא קולטת ובגלל זה נצמד אליי. אם הייתי מבינה קודם שהוא מתחיל איתי, הייתי חותכת את זה לפני שהוא נצמד אליי. ובאמת הייתי בטוחה שהוא הומו אז גם הרגשתי בנוח איתו. איך זה שאני כזו תמימה עדיין? ולמה אני צריכה לקבל פניות כאלה מגברים שיודעים שאני נשואה? הם לא מבינים שזה לא מתאים? אני גם משגעת את עצמי עם המחשבה ששידרתי משהו שלא התכוונתי אליו, למרות שאני חושבת שלא ובטח שלא היו לי כוונות כאלה לגביו. כאמור, הייתי בטוחה שהוא הומו. אני גם לא מתחנחנת או "עושה עיניים", או מפלרטטת או משמיעה רמיזות מיניות, לא מולו ולא בכלל מול גברים שהם לא בעלי. אז למה הוא חשב שאני ארצה את זה? ובמקביל אני תוהה למה בכלל אני מאשימה את עצמי בהתנהגות שלו? בקיצור, אוף. נשלח על ידי לילך

Published on 2012-01-26 16:10:19

Béa : "Et toi, tu manges ou tu mords ?"

Je marche vers le métro le soir et, comme d'habitude, deux mecs se tiennent à l'entrée de la station et font chier les filles qui y entrent. J'ai droit au traditionnel : "T'es super jolie toi" et autres conneries que j'ignore en roulant les yeux au ciel et en continuant à marcher. C'est alors qu'il me sort : "Alors tu suces ou t'avales ?" Je lui rétorque un "connard" exaspéré et bien senti et voilà que j'ai droit à une pluie d'injures allant de "salope" à "sale pute" et j'en passe (ces messieurs réagissent très mal quand on ose leur répondre, ils préfèrent sentir leur domination à notre humiliation et notre silence, bien entendu). Je descends l'escalier sous les insultes avant de me retourner et de lui lancer : "Et toi, tu manges ou tu mords ??" Son ami a trouvé ça hilarant et était mort de rire. Pour ma part, j'étais bien fière de moi mais lui n'a étonnament pas trouvé ça drôle du tout... Il est devenu franchement agressif et menaçant mais j'ai continué à marcher comme si de rien n'était et il ne m'a pas suivie. Eh ben oui mon gars, l'humiliation à caractère sexuel, c'est désagréable n'est-ce pas ?  

Published on 2012-01-26 15:31:04

Béatrice : "C'est moi le Grand Méchant Loup"

Je marchais dans le coin des Halles la nuit, seule. Un mec s'approche et commence à m'aborder : "Une jolie fille comme toi, seule la nuit... Tu n'as pas peur du grand méchant loup ?" Je l'ai regardé droit dans les yeux en prenant un air sérieux mais avec un sourire en coin et j'ai répondu avec assurance : "C'est moi le grand méchant loup." "Vraiment ?" a-t-il dit. "Vraiment" ai-je affirmé avec fermeté. Il est parti.  

Published on 2012-01-26 15:22:04

Stalking on Campus: A Silent Epidemic

The first steps to combating this crime include taking it seriously, having an appropriate policy, and training campus personnel and public safety officers on how to effectively respond.

Twenty-four people per minute are victims of rape, physical violence or stalking by an intimate partner in the United States, and a significant portion of these individuals attend, are employed by or are patients of universities, K-12 districts and hospitals. It is for this reason that Campus Safety magazine has developed a series of articles that aims to provide greater awareness and information on these troublesome, yet underreported crimes. The first installment, which follows, is on stalking. Read More: http://www.campussafetymagazine.com/Channel/Public-Safety/Articles/2012/01/Stopping-Stalkers.aspx

Published on 2012-01-26 04:44:06

Stephanie's story: "No one should ever have to go through this"

As I walked home from school 2 years ago when I was in the 9th-10th grade, I would be harassed by men who were old enough to be my grandfather and some of them were in their 20s passing by in cars saying things to me and even slowing down and screaming things to me from their cars and followed me as I walked along the side walk; I turned to say nothing to these men I ignored them yet they kept on. My experiences were so horrific and disturbing that when I told my parents,they stopped me from walking home and made it a point to pick me up from school and drop me off to make sure nothing like it ever happened again.We also found out that there are a number of registered sex offenders in the area in which I had to walk to and from school;a lot were for rape... At first, I was too scared and shaken up to even tell them about it. It felt like a part of me was being taken every time these old men would say such disgusting things to me even though they clearly knew I was a minor and not interested because I had on my school uniform and I looked my age. No one should ever have to go through this sort of thing..

Published on 2012-01-26 00:46:13

Stop Telling Women How Not To Get Raped

http://www.ebony.com/news-views/stop-telling-women-how-to-not-get-raped

Published on 2012-01-25 20:38:57

Why I Punched A Stranger

http://jezebel.com/5878537/why-i-punched-a-stranger

Published on 2012-01-25 20:37:36

Naše skromno istraživanje - trebamo još malo vaše pomoći!

Dragi svi, Kao što smo već najavili, provodimo upitnik o uznemiravanju na javnim mjestima. Jako smo uzbuđeni oko toga, jer je to, prema našim saznanjima, prvo istraživanje u Hrvatskoj koje se fokusira isključivo na uznemiravanje na javnim mjestima, i trebalo biti korisno za razumijevanje ne samo uznemiravanja na osnovu spola, već i spolne orijentacije, rodnog izražavanja, dobi, invaliditeta i drugog...   Svaki dan pratimo napredak i veselimo se novim anketama - dosada imamo skoro 200 anketa, a cilj nam je 500! Znači, još malo :-)   Zato još jednom pozivamo sve vas da ispunite naš upitnik i proslijedite link svima - znancima, neznancima, prijateljima, neprijateljima (facebook, mail, usmena predaja): http://www.surveygizmo.com/s3/755750/ISTRA-IVANJE-O-ULI-NOM-UZNEMIRAVANJU      

I ZAHVALJUJEMO svima koji su to već napravili!!!

 

Published on 2012-01-25 16:30:35

Insulto

A una amiga le gritaron chichona mientras trotaba, en el parque

Published on 2012-01-25 15:39:27

Lucy's Story: Disgusting

I was waiting at a local bus stop close to my apartment building, around 9pm, when this guy who was up the block a bit saw me and followed me to the bus stop. He asked for the time, and I thought he would be on his way, but then he stood very close to me, facing me, and would not move. I didn't want to run or make a sudden move, so I just stood , my phone in my hand, ready to turn and walk when I looked down and he had taken his pants off and was completely exposing himself. It was horrific and disgusting, and I just turned and calmly walked away. I looked over my shoulder, and the creep had already run off somewhere and was out of sight. I'm not sure why anyone would think it's ok to do something like that in public, but if I ever see this individual again, I will call the police and use my pepper spray.

Published on 2012-01-25 12:06:07