I was walking home from a friends house, I was 15. A car pulled up alongside me and a middle-aged man got out and said ‘Hey, can I touch you for a few minutes?’ I stopped and looked at him, and kept walking, completely ignoring him until I saw him drive away. Later on the same walk two men (teenagers? Maybe 20?) started following me and yelling ‘hey baby, come here.’ I ignored both of them, too, and they got angry and started yelling ‘what are you deaf? get over here.’ Luckily there was a fence between us and they gave up after following me for a couple of blocks. These are just two of the many, many times I’ve been harassed.
As I approached my bus stop and waited for my bus to work, two incidents of sexual harassment occurred within seconds of each other. First, a group of young men in a car, waiting in traffic beside the bus stop, waved, smirked, and shouted at me. Then, as I reached the bus stop, an older man who was also waiting at the stop approached me. We were the only two people around, but the stop is beside a high traffic road and it was in broad daylight. The older man, a stranger, began a conversation with me that started out innocently enough as we talked about the weather. He then told me that I looked very nice and I was very well dressed, and asked if I was a model. He kept telling me how great I looked and that I should be a model, and when the bus finally arrived at our stop he said he felt flattered and honored to be riding the bus with a model. He also asked questions about my personal life, how old I was, where I work, etc. I did begin to feel uncomfortable, because we were the only people around the bus stop and I could not leave because I needed to use the bus to get to work on time.
I had know him since I was baby his wife was my mums best friend, he was my fathers. I had just turned 16 he was 54 I was working for him, he owned a small spray painting business, it was only ever me and him there.
At the begging everything was fine we were just getting work done, but after a couple of shifts he would stand really close to me and put his hand on my bum, when ever he stood next to me or talked to me he would always be touching me. I just brushed it off as just friendly affection since I had know him all my life. I told my mum thought just for precaution. The next shift he kept on talking about if how I ever got chemicals on me I would have to remove all my cloths and he would have to wash it off me. I found that creepy. The next shift I had to work I sat on paint thinners that were on the seat I only sit on and which he told me to sit on. It was burning my skin but I was to scared to tell him so I just dealt with it. He asked me to help him paint somthing, he looked at me and said I was about to do somthing inappropriate I just laughed, it’s what I do when I’m uncomfortable, he placed the hose witch vibrates between my legs so it was against my vagina, I just laughed. He then continually made jokes about it “don’t have to much fun with that” “I know when you do that you are having way to much fun at work” I had never been so uncomfortable in my life. I went home and told my mum everything and that no matter what I was not going back. She wanted to take it to the police and talk to his wife about it but I made her swear to serequcy I don’t like dealing with things so the less drama we let it cause the easier it would be for me. I hate myself for just laughing but I just didn’t know what else to do. I’m still 16 and I still think about it all the time.
There is a man who works as a cleaner in my apartment block. Since I moved here, I’ve had a couple of interactions with him; held the door open for him a couple of times, greeted him when I saw him, helped him pick up a load of paper after somebody had trashed the complex’s lobby. Basically, I treated him with basic decency. Not excessive kindness or flirtation; just basic decency. When I took the lift the other day to the ground floor, I saw he was in there and greeted him briefly. As the door closed, he began stroking my arm, and told me that there was a girl who looked very like me in a shop he goes to. He then started touching the ‘beauty spot’ (mole tbh) above my lip with his thumb, and said that she had that too. He was standing very close to me, and as we were in a lift, I was pretty scared. I am on the 10th floor in my apartment block, but have taken the stairs ever since.
One day I was waiting in the bus stop that I usually waited at and while I was waiting I was standing in front of a shop. A man that I did not know kept on staring at me. At first I thought he wanted to go to the shop so I moved but then he still kept staring at me and moved closer to me , at that point I was getting really scared he was not smiling or anything like that just looking at me constantly. The clothes I was wearing were not revealing just some jeans and a long sleeve shirt with a jacket over. I did not know what to do I just walked away and he started stalking me when i noticed this I ran and didn’t stop until he was out of sight and walked all the way home.
A van full of boys passed by me and the driver yelled “wanna bang us?” out the window at me. He was going at least 10mph above the speed limit. No, I don’t want to bang you, and you don’t look cool driving your Mom’s minivan.
I was coming out of a large chain gas station, and there was a group of men hanging around an SUV who started to make sexual comments about my body. I ignored them and kept walking to my car. As I passed, I heard one of them say, “Oh, look at her get that power-walk on.”
Then another of them began to follow me and call after me. At this point, I was alarmed. So I turned around and told him to “Get away from me.” He kept walking toward me.
“You get away from me now,” I shouted. “Or I’m calling the police.”
I was safely on the road as I pulled around and from my vantage point could see there was actually a large group of them hanging around that SUV and neither going in nor coming out of the store. I pulled over, looked up the number of the store chain, and called their manager who promised to have the cops come and get rid of them. I wish I could have done the report myself, but at least the message was sent.
I was waiting to be served at a bar. A guy came up and stood really close to me, acting creepy, and said “oh mmm damn you are so sexy, I’ll buy you a drink and you can come dance with me gorgeous”
I ignored him and carried on looking forward, not in the mood to even reply. He waved his hand right in front of my face saying “hey don’t be so rude, why are you ignoring me I offered to buy you a fucking drink”.
I said “I don’t want you to buy me a drink and I don’t want to talk to strangers, I’m just here with my friends”.
So then he said “well that’s fucking rude it’s just a drink. Don’t know why I even started talking to you in the first place, you’re ugly as pig shit” and leant over the bar to shout at the barman “don’t serve this bitch she’s rude as fuck”.
So you called me sexy and gorgeous until I didn’t want to talk to you then I became a bitch and ugly as pig shit. And I was the rude one?
My coworker and I (both women) were ending one of our regular lunchtime walks around the park when a guy started walking next to us and saying “Excuse me, excuse me”. We ignored him at first and hurry by him (there are a bunch of bike rental people at that entrance so you usually have to dodge a few people trying to get your attention like this). He kept walking very close to my coworker facing us.
And then the conversation went like this-
my coworker: sorry, no thanks
him: I just want to walk with you . . . (now shouting) I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL
my coworker: I don’t want you to tell me that
(we abruptly change directions)
me: sorry we have to go
him (shouting): YOU DON’T WANT TO TALK TO A BLACK MAN, THAT’S FINE! YOU’RE RACISTS!
he kept shouting things along those lines until we had crossed the intersection and were out of ear shot.
All these incidents happened within a week and around the same subway station since its near my home:
1. I am not from New York or USA. I feel cold even when the locals do not. I was wearing a jacket and had the hood up and I passed by a bar. Two men were hanging outside it. One of them said, “Aww come on, it isn’t that cold. Want me to warm you up?”.
2. I was waiting to cross the street and someone cut the signal and crossed the street. He then turned around and was encouraging his friend to cross as well when he saw me. He kept staring at me till the light changed and I crossed. As I passed by him, he commented to his friend “She is gorgeous, isn’t she?” and his friend made an appreciative noise. I thought that was it but as I kept walking a sharp, loud whistle followed.
3. Two men were standing a couple of steps away from each other. I passed the first one by. He was like “hey baby, hey, you look fine. Mm-mmm.” As I was passing the next one, he was like “Is this man bothering you? If he is let me know. I will set him straight.” When they were behind me, the second one was like “at least I got a smile from her”. I didn’t smile at all.