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Yesterday on the way home from the gym I was walking quickly wearing my black gym pants and a lululemon jacket. I was in no way looking inappropriate.
I was carrying bags ontop of my gym bag as i was having people for dinner that night. As i was walking one way a few people came into my path as they had just crossed the street so as i was weaving through a few people, a large man wearing sunglasses was passing by behind me and he leaned in quickly into my ear and said “damn!”. There are two things, one why did he feel like he had the right to invade my space to get in my ear like that and what did he think would happen as a result? That i would fall down to my knees right then and there and suck him off? What are these ass hats actually thinking?! I kept walking briskly and refused to give him the time of day. But it’s disgusting.
Just now on campus, an older man came up behind me and said “I like how you walk” I turned around startled and he repeated “I like the way you are walking”. I muttered thanks under my breath, hoping he would walk away, but I guess he didn’t hear me because he said “say thank you” and then louder “SAY THANK YOU!” I stared him down and didn’t say a word, even though I was scared of his aggressive attitude.
A man in a pickup truck yelled to me from traffic about my appearance as I was walking to work.
I had been to the hospital and was unfamiliar with the bus route and had to wait for about an hour in central Halifax. Whilst walking towards Smiths a group of men dispersed in the crowd were watching me. At least one asked me if I had been paid for it. I was harassed for ten minutes on and off and I felt uncomfortable standing near the bus stop. I dislike smokers and found I could only waste ten minutes in the vegan cafe that I only discovered about six weeks ago. I felt very uncomfortable going to do a bit of shopping. As a staunch Christian feminist I will avoid like the plague the area as it is clearly unsafe. I try not to use public transport at all and I stopped going to Bradford due to the roaring car engines and thumping car radios.
I chose Halifax hospital due to it being nice and modern but it is too far to go if travelling by bus.
Just now my neighbour’s daughter’s boyfriend said something derogatory as I was mowing the lawn.
I believe it was my senior year of high school. I had dressed up nicely that day, wearing a dress – heels and all – to promote a dance concert that was the following evening. During one of my classes I left, most likely to use the restroom, and on my way back to the classroom I was approached by a male student in the hallway. I had never met him before, he was probably in a different grade, so I continued walking past him. He started trying to get my attention by calling me “shawty”. He began following me down the hallway yelling things at me. “Damn girl, why you all dressed up?” “You look real good today.” “Why don’t you turn around so I can get a good look at ya?” I did what most women do and ignored him. He then became angry. I could hear is pace slow behind me until he stopped and shouted, “Fine. Rude bitch.”
I never said anything to this boy or school authorities (which I now realize I should have at least brought it to their attention) but it does worry me that even though his volume was so loud, in an empty hallway, with classes going on, that none of the teachers or students thought it necessary to stop harassment on school grounds. That was not the only time I was the victim of cat-calling on campus during school hours. It never even mattered what I was wearing or if I was alone or if the harasser was alone.
Street harassment shouldn’t happen anywhere, let alone the halls of a school. I would urge Eaglecrest High School to pay more attention to the way their students treat their classmates. I can assure them I was not breaking the dress code that day or any day, but it never stopped me from being the target of someone’s harassment.
To save money, I ride public transportation to work. Every day something inappropriate is said about my appearance and body, but this past Friday I was genuinely afraid. I was riding the bus to the metrolink. There were not any seats left, so I stood. I did not mind standing. Then this man stood up from his seat and said “Baby, come on have my seat. Sit down, baby” and I declined the offer. He insisted and was not going to sit down. So, I accepted the seat. When I approached the seat he got in my space and turned with me and I fell into the seat and he boxed me in. Then he started talking about how sexy he thought I was. And then smelled me and said I smelled nice too. Then I tried to ignore him, but he was so close and I did not know what he was going to do. He kept talking “If I was your man, I would never let go of you, baby let me be your man” me: “No, I already have somebody and we are very happy.” bystanders laugh as this goes on. Mt eyes search for someone to care, or help. But my eyes only see smiles. One man tells him to lay off me through spurts of laughter. Then the harasser reaches in his bag and gives me a disc. The same man who told him to layoff says: “girl, do not throw that away, that is a free movie and it is money” and I continue to try my best to ignore both of them…finally it is my stop and I make my way off that bus as fast as I can and throw the damn disc away, too. I am just so tired of this happening to me. I am sick of being told it is my fault because of my body type and appearance.
One of my friends that I had known for a few months sent me a dm on Twitter. He tried to ask me out and I told him I had a boyfriend. After learning this, he persistently asked for nudes saying things like “it doesn’t have to be shirtless” and “it’s not that bad”, “can I at least get a look at your underwear drawer?”.
I told him no and I had no idea what to do.
After a week I finally told my parents. He got in trouble (not a lot) and I got grounded and interrogated on “what I said to provoke it”.
We were 15.
It happens on an everyday basis, virtually. If you are female and walk down the street you get asked, “How much”, and slag, or slut, etc. from random men passing by or from men in cars shouting out to you. It’s no good blaming it on what a woman wears, because even when you are wearing no make-up, no high heels, hair unbrushed and a long dress they still do it. Also, the people driving the cars should be concentrating on the traffic and road, not neglecting it to look out the window and harass a woman. I would say, “How much” is the most common phrase and then you are asked 70p, etc. It is unacceptable to be harassed just because you happen to be female, especially in the 21st century.
I worked at a restaurant in an area (shopping district) that is widely considered nice, and somewhat “high-class”. I was on my break and and decided to walk to the Panera two blocks away. On my way back two men were crossing the street from the other end. As I walked past them one said: damn girl you’re beautiful. I wasn’t so much scared, as taken aback. It was broad daylight and there were tons of people around. I still felt uncomfortable despite the fact it “sounded like a compliment.”
As usual, i was going home after closing the bar i used to work at, it was around 4a. So i was (a little bit) drunk, heading to my flat, at a 2mn walk away, walking on a big lightened pedestrian street when a groupe of 4 or 5 young men joined me. One criticized my low waist jeans saying he sees everything and the others laughed when i stammered a multiple excuse “you don’t see anything / i’m wearing a boxer/it’s not my fault my button gave way sooner”. last thing i remember, the guy who adressed me put a hand against my throat, pining me against the church’s wall. They all left laughing. I ran back home. I don’t want to blame myself for being tipsy, i don’t want to feel guilty about an outfit, but i do feel bad about the explanation i gave them : we shouldn’t need any.