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First time he got me was back in 9/05. Just another morning on the train or so I thought, but alas this was no ordinary train ride. Shortly after the train left the station I felt this little creepers hand on my crotch. It was still summer and I was wearing a skirt. It was a rather rude awakening to say the very least. I made a huge scene and proceeded to punch him in the head and he just ran out of the train at the 53rd St. and Lexington Ave. stop.
After that I would see him on the train from time to time or in my stop waiting for the train. Every time I’d see him I’d stare him down or sometimes I’d go so far as to antagonize him and tell him I was watching him. During these chance encounters I had the opportunity to observe his “perv-technique”. He turns his back on his victims, cups his hand, and reaches it out behind him. I have been coming into work a little later for the past couple of months so I had not seen in him in a while.
Last Thursday 12/13, I squeezed into a very crowded Manhattan bound E-train and the doors closed behind me. Soon after the train left the station I felt a rather strange sensation in my nether regions. Someone was grabbing a hold of my crotch and holding on for dear life. Now initially I thought to myself; “This is a very crowded train, maybe it’s an accident? Where in the world is this hand coming from”. There was a man with his back turned directly in front of me and a woman to his right facing me. I proceeded to move said hand away and the individual forcefully put it back on my crotch. This is when I brought my magazine up as a buffer between me and this perverts filthy paws and I tapped the man on the shoulder and said “what are you doing?” Man ignored and moved his hand and himself away from me and that’s when it hit me. I recognized that iron grip and I proceeded to make a huge scene and told the guy to stop touching me and told him I was going to report him to the police. I must’ve screamed at him for 3 stops. Eventually he got off the train.
As soon as I got off the train on West 4th I approached an officer and explained what had just transpired and he was just “like there’s nothing that can be done”. Later, when I got to work, my co-worker suggested I call 311 and they forwarded me to 911. Two police officers were dispatched to my office. When they arrived my boss escorted them to our conference room and said he would come and get me. The officer’s told my boss they “couldn’t wait”. When I came into the conference room I told the officers the story and showed them the picture I had snapped with my camera-phone. One of the officers asked me if I had a gun and when I said I didn’t, he suggested I “get one”. They offered some tips in case I encounter him again in the future. They didn’t take a statement and just told me to report it to the transit hub. I obtained the number for the transit hub and called and left a message and I still have not heard back from anyone.
No one on the train did anything to stop this guy. While I realize this man fondling me on the train is not the end of the world, I just feel like enough is enough. This is the second time this has happened in a 2 year span, and I am fairly certain I am not his only victim. At least, I can stand up for myself but I shudder to think what if I had been a young girl? I feel like the attitude I get from law enforcement, that are supposed to protect us is, to “just get over it.” I’ll get over it alright.. when I mace the shit out of him next time I see him. So ladies, if you see this man on the train watch your crotch!
Submitted by Verde
I’m only 14, and I get harassed every single day. I don’t dress a certain way at all, or anything, and I look my age, so why are older men so gross?
I was walking with one of my friends, when we pass this weird looking guy, who was handing out flyers. He had to be like, in his late 20’s. My friend and I are 14 and 16. We ignored him, and kept walking, since we didn’t want any stupid flyer, but he FOLLOWS us, and keeps poking me in the shoulder with the papers he’s handing out. Then he grabs my friend’s shoulder to try and stop her, and she quickly jerked away. I wasn’t really thinking, so I tried to take one of the flyers so he would go away, but when I grabbed the paper, he didn’t let go, instead he tried to grab my arm and pull me toward him. My friend didn’t know I was behind, so she kept walking. I was so terrified, frozen, and he wouldn’t let go of me! Finally I pulled away, and caught up with my friend, and I told her what happened, and she was shocked, and said she had no clue and that she thought I was behind her. She kept saying it was her fault because she kept walking, but I said, “No, it was that sick pervert’s fault.”
A few months before, I remember getting a phone call from my other friend, who is a bit younger than me. She was 13 at the time, and I had just turned 14. She called my house, crying, and I was scared. She told me she was at the bookstore, and some older man sat next to her, and tried to talk to her, and was hitting on her. She said he kept asking for her phone number, and he wouldn’t stop, so she gave it to him so he’d stop. She said that he was calling her house now. A week later, I went to the same books store, and sat down to read. A man came over to me and asked me if I knew the time. There were other people around me, so that’s all he said at first. I shook my head no, and he alked away, but kept walking back and forth in the area I was in until everyone around me left. Then he crouched down next to me, took a book from the shelf, and sat right next to me pretending to read it. This sick-o kept scooting closer and closer to me, and then started asking me personal questions like where I live. I tried to ignore him, but he kept asking me, so I gave him fake answers, and a fake name. He kept bothering me, and eventually I ran away because he didn’t leave. A few weeks later I came back and saw him bothering a girl who looked to be about 10.
Submitted by Ali
This is a bit of a public service announcement to any women who ride the train in New York:
This morning on my way to work on the C train a normal looking, unassuming guy took cell phone video footage up my skirt. I can only speculate about how much footage he got before two good Samaritans warned me. Needless to say the whole experience was completely unexpected, violating, victimizing, and sickening. Who knows what this sick pervert is going to do with the images? My friend said that this has been happening all around NYC – crowded trains, long lines in stores, even on the street. So if you’re wearing a skirt – no matter what length (mine was knee length) – be aware of your surroundings.
Submitted by K
i was walking down the street near my house and this guy asks me if i want “a stick or a dick?” not even sure what that really means, but as i turned around to take his picture, he takes mine too! and really close up. i continue standing outside the supermarket finishing my cigarette before i go inside and he proceeds to show me the “beautiful picture.” i grabbed his phone and tried to erase it, but he grabbed it back. i told him he was disgusting and he just smirked at me. he also had a picture of a girl with a huge ass in a thong as his phone screensaver. he obviously never had a mother.
Submitted by Rachel
in my city in manchester nh there seems to be a lot of men under the impression that any female outside is a prostitute. at any given day i could be seen wearing over sized tee shirts and jeans. nothing most people would consider sexy. any way i could be walking any where in my city and some guy i never met will stop his car, look at me, and ask if i’ll get in his car. of course i refuse and they beg me. “oh please i’m so lonely.” they say. “sorry, dude.” i say and i’m gone. sometimes they leave, sometimes they follow. one jerk offered me 15 bucks.
a man called DJ gave me a helping hand. one of those random acts of kindness strangers do for one another. only he expected me to shirk my responsibilities to my child and my friend’s child i was babysitting and have sex with him in return. he was down right offended when i refused, he had the gall to say that i was using him. this jerk insisted on helping me. oh i might point out that this jerk is married.
the problem is so big in this town that the police are actually cracking down on it. so i’m guessing dj’s wife will find out sooner or later and divorce the hell out of him.
sorry i have no pictures of him. i don’t have a camera phone. but if it helps he’s overweight, middle aged and has short blond curly hair i believe his eyes were blue.
Submitted by B.L. new hampshire
The woman was taken to the hospital and is in serious condition. The driver of the truck is still at large. If he’s ever found, police say they may charge him with attempted murder.
Submitted by Ann
Last year, I was completing my year of study in Japan. My american friend Laura and I were in Tokyo for a week. She and her family (her father being Japanese) had come and invited me up to Tokyo to stay with them in the hotel so we could bond and I could act as their translator. One day, her parents decided that they were going to go to a temple and told us we would be left on our own. Now, the part of Tokyo we were in was near Roppongi, which is… a very shady part of the town (we didn`t find out how shady till too late), the hotel was a block away from the Russian Embassy.
We hung around the hotel for a while until we decided we would go out to eat. We were NOT dressed slutty in ANYWAY. I am a Muslim so I always wear my head shawl and a dozen layers of clothing. Not to mention it was wet and rainy so we had heavy jackets on. As we walked down the street we talked and tried to figure out what we were going to eat. As we passed by a McDonalds I heard someone say “Hi!”. I hadn`t heard English spoken in such a long time that I stopped, turned and looked at two men who were grinning at me and Laura. Laura and I exchanged a look, we had never seen either of these two men before, so we continued walking.
Then we heard “Hey! Wait up!” and the two men came out of the McDonalds after us. Instantly we panicked and took off running. The men FOLLOWED US. Laura, the faster runner, made it into the department store a block down while I was grabbed by the short One. The tall One went into the department store after Laura and dragged her back out. They started asking us questions, wanting to know if we would come with them to their apartment. They asked us if we would get in a car with them. They asked us if we wanted to “have some fun” with them. Now, mind you, Laura and I are 18 years old, in a foreign country, being forcibly held by two guys and no one is doing a thing to help us.
We try to get away but they just hold tighter onto us. The short guy was holding so tight onto my arm that it left a bruise. They kept feeling us up and asking us crude questions. We kept telling them that we had to leave and that we were going to go get something to eat. So they took us into a subway and bought us sandwhiches. They then managed to sit us against the wall so we couldn`t dash out.
They then literally made us eat the sandwiches, saying it was cute to watch us eat. It turned my stomach, especially as the short guy started to touch my thigh. After what was an eternity, a friend of theirs` walked in and they stood up to talk to them. I think they were high or something because their eyes were blood shot and the tall One was twitching alot.
Anyways, Laura and I then took the opportunity to escape, we ran out of there, literally knocking a few chairs over in our escape. Once out of the store we ran all the way back to the Russian Embassy to the safety of the security guards (who WERE armed, yay!). They watched out for the two men as we caught our breath, we then hurried back to our hotel where we asked the Manager to call the police. We filled out a police report and spent the last day of our trip in Tokyo hidden in the hotel room because we were too afraid to leave.
I have never felt so scared and threatened before in my life. I wanted nothing more than to escape from those two. If their friend hadn`t come in when she did I don`t know what would have happened to us.
Tonight around 10 PM, on a train back to her apartment in Williamsburg, a hooded man seated next to my best friend, a 22 year old woman, whispered in her ear “I am going to follow you when you get up.” He did follow her, just a step behind, up the subway steps of her stop and out onto the street. With great clarity in a life-threatening moment, she stepped inside a bodega, while he stood outside, waiting for her, and was fortunate to find a couple who were willing to walk her the few steps from the market to her apartment door. When they exited the bodega, the hooded man was still there, waiting for his (potential) victim. Unfortunately, it took the help of two people–a woman to make her feel safe, and a man to protect her– to allow this woman to arrive home unharmed.
The most important part of this is that my friend is safe, but I feel such anger and rage that men like this, who derive such a false, disgusting sense of power from physically and sexually threatening women in public (or private), can make strong, smart, powerful women like my friend doubt their decision to live alone if they choose, to live free and independent lives, or to merely live at all. I am completely disgusted, and concerned for my friend.
Submitted by R.P.
I was at Burger King at Main St. and Roosevelt Ave in Flushing with some friends, hanging out. We were about to leave when this guy (who had previously asked for money) sitting next to us goes “Hey, you, whats up? I want to suck you.” I looked at him, disgusted, and replied “you’re fucking gross.” He then proceeds to get up and follow us out while wiggling his tongue at me. He said “I want to suck your pussy”, and would have probably stuck his tongue in my ear had I not moved away. My friend and I told him he was a fucking pervert and he followed us to the corner. Ugh.
Submitted by Cheer
My girl and I were walking down the street yesterday. As with every day when we/she/I walk down the street, some jerk in a prettied-up car decided it was his business to violate our space by sticking his head out of the window and assaulting us with a list of sleazy, misogynistic, homophobic and idiotic comments. He seemed to think that we wanted to know all about the fact that hot lesbians were part of his heterosexual male fantasy… he was wrong.
In response to his violent penetration of our personal space, my girlfriend and I screamed a list of obsenities at him, telling him exactly what he could do with his fantasy, his over-inflated ego, and his fucked up attitude. Apparently, women getting angry at his harassment was not a response he was used to, so he stuck his head back out the window to let us know that we were “fucked up bitches” and “crazy fucking psychos”. Shit, why hadn’t we noticed? Clearly we were the psychos, considering we were the ones cruising around town and looking to assault vulnerable individuals.
His car paused at a set of lights, and he continued to scream at us, throwing his fist around and piling every swear word he knew into discriptions of us. Fed up, my spunky girlfriend shot a massive glob of spit onto his beautifully painted car. Inspired by her actions, I too walked up to his car, and kicked the back of it as hard as I could. This sent him into a frenzy, and he jumped out of his car to further yell abuse at us. We pointed out that the police were sitting across at the next set of lights, so he backed off, but continued to scream at us as he drove away.
Now, some might think it was a bit of an overreaction to kick someone’s property in response to a “compliment”. I’d like to tell those people to take their ignorant, sexist agendas and shove it up their arses. As a woman and as a lesbian, I spend every day of my life confined by the consequences of men’s belief that it is perfectly acceptable to verbally, physically and sexually assualt, harass, and intimidate me. I spend each day fighting off unwanted physical advances, being powerless to respond to drive-by sexual advances, having to shut up and ignore the endless streams of catcalls and wolf whistles, watching program after program representing women as sexual/domestic play objects for men, and battling with both men and women to convince them that yes, it is important to be aware of the the power issues that surround gender relations. I spend nights crying as a result of the sexual abuse I have experienced, days altering my routes so I can feel safe when walking home, and endless hours being overwhelmed by how much work is yet to be done in order to create a world which is safe, equal and free from violence and intimidation.
That kick to the back of the prettied-up car, therefore, was a kick for every man who has ever intimidated, objectfied, assaulted, abused, taken advantage of, raped, or hit a woman. It was for every catcall, wolf whistle, and unwanted comment any woman has ever received since becoming old enough to be violated. It was also a warning to each individual who thinks it is ok to harass women, whether in public or in private.
And fuck, it felt good.
Watch out world… I’ve discovered the power to holla back, and holla back I will.
Submitted by Sandra