20 starving Komodo Dragons

I wish I’d found this site weeks ago. My roommate and I had gone out for drinks at our favorite pub, hoping to chat with a few of the regulars we’ve become close to while studying abroad. As we’re sitting there, this group of Belfast men, most old enough to be my father, begin beckoning me over. I refuse and try to ignore them, but every time the come up to the bar, they plant themselves on either side of my chair and press close. I continue to try to ignore them, only keeping my hand on my purse, because the area we’re living (and drinking) in has had a recent spike in pickpocketing. By now, my regular friends are beginning to get annoyed. One has been telling them off and another takes up fighting stance when two of them decide it’ll be a good time to spin me around. I tell my friends to ignore them, they aren’t worth it and try to return to my conversation when the youngest throws his arms around my shoulders and my roommate’s and starts begging us for kisses and both of us are telling him about the boyfriends we’ve left back in the states (convenient fibs about guys who we’ve both just recently turned down). These jerks just won’t let up, though and when I lean across the bar to tell the bartender (another friend and woman) that they’re all mad and I’m getting freaked, one tries to shove his fingers up my rear through my (knee-length, 3/4 sleeve) dress and black tights. I scream and nearly jump the bar and promptly hide and then the youngest tries to come around the bar when my roommate has finally told him that it he doesn’t get off, she’ll break his nose (she could and would do it, too). When I tell him he and his friends are making me uncomfortable and I don’t appreciate having my butt grabbed, he makes a grab for me and I jump away. He only managed to get my hip. At this point, the bartender kicks them all out (except for one drunken lout who’s so hammered he passes out and cuts his head open on the bar). I wish I’d said more. I wish I’d told them what pathetic, dirty little toads they all were.

I found out later that week they were living in our building. We both avoid the courtyard like there’s a 20 starving Komodo Dragons living out there, except I think these guys are scarier!

Submitted by Alicia

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3 Responses

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  1. Pat Morrissey says:

    I am shocked and very sorry you were treated this way. I am also annoyed with the staff for allowing this behavior in their bar, for as long as they did.

    Please do not hesitate in calling the guards if these thugs intimidate you in any way. As you know where they live, the guards may be able to help.

  2. Chris says:

    I really hate to use the term “culture”, but I am uncertain exactly as to why yet, even so, I will. There seems to be a perpetuated “culture” that men are actually expected to behave in this uncouth manner and it really pisses me off. The more social media gets relevant the more obvious it is to me. I lived most of my life in denial that most men acted like this, but now I am beginning to think that I am the aberrant here. I just don’t get why men act like this? Does this behavior EVER get them anywhere? And if it does, who the hell are the girls that let them? I have seen groups of guys talk when women are not around and it seems pretty significantly different than when they are around for the most part, so it seems obvious to me that they know acting like this is in no way a good way to behave. It boggles the mind.

    Very few people say what they wish they would have said when things happen like this. It’s unfortunate, but it would likely have not done the situation any better. I do recognize that it could likely have made you feel a bit better, at the time at least. I should also say that it would be unlikely they would have actually remembered it if they were as drunk as it sounds. Either way, I would feel like you and wish I would have done/said something to get back at them weather it escalated the situation or not.

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