My Experience

The recent most recent experience at work and here we go again, another “fortune 500, one of America’s Best Places to Work” and this creep starts in with the catcalling, etc. That quickly escalated to grabbing behind the neck and shoulders. Anything to make contact and get a squeeze. After my avoiding the person and keeping my husband at bay (no, an altercation at work would not be a good idea) I ended up going to HR and filing a complaint. It wasn’t just going to be my problem any more. Having to sit in front of my boss and the rep was embarassing. I couldn’t even admit to them at the time that he started touching me. They asked about witnesses and to tell you the truth, at the time that wasn’t my biggest concern . The “here we go again” light bulb didn’t go off in my brain. It was a busy day before Christmas and like everyone else, I was tired and a bit stressed out. Besides, I didn’t know at the time how quickly this would escalate. While sitting there, I felt almost as if they didn’t believe me and that in itself compounded just how badly I felt. My husband keeps telling me that I cannot imagine how wicked and warped some men’s minds can be. He is trying to protect me and all women with such a statement but getting too paranoid isn’t the answer either. Guess the lesson is to never let your guard down and don’t be afraid to speak up. Also, don’t deny the emotional damage and how it inconveniences your life. From my most recent experience, I felt angry, degraded, shamed, and frustrated. Not being able to just go to work and deal with the issues at hand without having to worry about how to avoid a confrontation and what the next surprise would be. Also, would I be labeled “a bitch” for being too thin skinned or overreactive? The point is, I felt violated and that in itself made it wrong.

Submitted by J.F.

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