Advice on dealing with racial and sexual harassment: BE STRONG LADIES

I’ve live in NYC my whole life and I’ve experienced both sexual verbal harassment and racism almost all the time. I get unwanted stares on a daily basis, but you know what, as a woman you should learn to fight back and protect yourself. I’ve learned some ways to scare those harassers off. Do whatever you can to protect yourself, if you feel like a creep is following you, act like a psycho, start talking to yourself and w/e, cause no one wanna mess with a psycho and carry a pepper spray.

My ways of handling these situations are always having my IPOD on, so i can’t hear those whistles or catcalls, i can easily ignore them if i don’t hear it, all that’s left is them looking like idiots if you can’t hear them.

When some creep is staring at me nonstop, i’ll look back with a very angry scary looking pisst off face, like the kind u don’t wanna mess with, that’ll sure to ruin whatever fantasy they’re having, and if i have to, i’ll curse at them.

The more women act scared, the more they will harass you, you gotta teach yourself to act like you’re a demon and no one can touch you, don’t be the one who’s scared, be the one to scare!!! take good notes from those ghetto black teenage girls, there’s a reason why no one wants to deal with them.


Submitted by Cheryl

Ever stood up for yourself like Cheryl did? It feels great, right?!? Help others find the courage to do the same! You can, with $5.

12 responses to “Advice on dealing with racial and sexual harassment: BE STRONG LADIES

  1. take good notes from those ghetto black teenage girls, there’s a reason why no one wants to deal with them.

    I was with you until that comment. Do we really need to label people like that to empower women?

  2. I just wanted to say that I found your post to be extremely distasteful. “take good notes from those ghetto black teenage girls”, there’s a reason why no one wants to deal with them.”
    I don’t understand your point in singling out Black teenagers and associating the word “ghetto” with them. The last time I checked, ghetto was a term to describe a living condition (ie., impoverished neighborhood), not a personality trait — but that just shows your stupidity.

    It wouldn’t even make sense for me to get offended so I won’t even waste my time with that issue. Your advice makes absolutely no sense either.

  3. Another thing…if we’re not allowed to bring up the race of the harasser (unless race ties into the story), how come “ghetto black teenage girls” was allowed to be used in this submission? Many of these quote-unquote “ghetto black teenage girls” are being harassed by the same men constantly being mentioned in these stories. Women need to stand together when it comes to harassment, not make racist and classist judgments that break that allegiance up.

    1. I couldn’t agree more. We published this because we wanted to convey her experience, but harassment happens to all of us. And looking “tough” or “ghetto” doesn’t make it go away.

  4. I have to admit that what Cheryl said about acting like a demon or a crazy woman actually works… I only posted the worst cases I had… but other cases I’ve just pulled my phone and told them i would be calling the police… i even screamed at a whole bunch of tough guys on my way to work that if i ever get one more comment from anyone i swear by my mother that they would all end up in jail. It worked… i was never harrassed again on my way to work.

    What bothers me from these harrassers is that no matter how conservative you dress, they still have the nerve to make a comment… regardless of how you dress they should respect.

    About cheryl’s comment, I lived in NYC 14 years… and I have to say that I was threatened and harrassed constantly in my teenage years by blacks and puertorican girls… that would pick on my height, push me, threaten to kill me and laugh at me (as if that were a joke)… my parents tried their best with the deans and school teachers… but even they were scared of them… at the end they ended up providing a free “bodyguard” that helped me not get bullied as much. I swear i dont mean to sound racist at all (as I have mentioned in previous post, I’m hispanic and have no reason to be racist) but it was a very scary experience.

  5. Appreciate you creating this blog and sharing your viewpoint. I enjoy reading it within my lunch break at work. It is nice to take my mind off work even though for only 30 mins. Cheers

  6. I have lived in nyc all my life. It seems to me that alot of the antagonism and fear and hate comes from those “outsiders” who come in to gentrify the city. I lived in minneapolis for a while so I know the mind set pretty well. They bring their fear with them. They only know what they see on the news or movies so they come here with their puffed out chests and 1,000 yard stares. But we all know that when confronted they will reun or scream. They are at their best in groups of themselves.

    About acting like a psycho..are you sure that guys ARE looking at YOU? Following YOU? Intrested in YOU? In a city this crowded everyone is filled with so much fear. I dont know if your Black but I assume if you mention racism in your post you must be. Alot of woman who would have to pay to be mugged seem to scream the loudest when in reality nothing has ever happened to them and nothing will. They get upset when they see it happening to somebody else. A over hyped response like “talk to yourself or become a psycho too” sounds really stupid. Alot of woman who are very attractive have other ways of stopping harassment without resorting to becoming a fool. I remember I adjusted myself in the train and a white woman stared at me like I did it to her…I was dressed in a suit, on the other side of the train and do what guys do..adjust their package every now and then. Funny thing is this woman was very unattarctive..FUGLY really. But her hyperactive response was because of the news coverage, not because she cared. How many men have been reported for doing just that? A normal response to have a penis? I have seen woman put makeup on the train and adjust their bras…are they sluts trying to turn guys on? I have young sisters and dont like the cat-calling they receive but this is a little too much.

    Also, you must need some deeper help because to put race in with this issue means you have a deeper problem. Before you become a mumbling to yourself psycho for real get help with that.



  7. I understand the use of iPods here as a way to ignore harrassment, but isn’t it potentially dangerous to be using iPods while in the streets or subways? I would think they cut back on the user’s awareness of what is going on around her/him. With an iPod blasting music into your ears, how will you be able to hear when someone is sneaking up behind you, or a truck or car is approaching? This applies to joggers too…if you are jogging on an isolated street or in a park, why use an iPod when you should be aware of all sounds around you? Some of those sounds might be potential attackers on the prowl.

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