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I have to start by applauding this website. I heard about this site on the CW11 evening news. I hope it lets women know that it is NOT their fault. I only wish I had someone to tell me that when this incident happened to me.
As many new yorkers know, the 6 train isn’t exactly the emptiest trains, especially during rush hour. On this specific morning, it was especially crowded. It was so crowded that something behind me was poking me on my butt. I turned around to see what it was and this bald headed man, wearing a shirt and tie was behind me, smiling as he held an umbrella to my butt. I made the mistake of maneuvering around to face him in hopes that he would be too embarrassed to be do something to me as I faced him. He decided to rub his umbrella on my crotch instead. While all this happened, my heart was leaping out of my chest and I kept thinking “I should scream, no, no one would believe me. They’ll say I shouldn’t have worn tight jeans. I can tell him to stop, but what if he has a weapon? But where could he go in this crowd? What if he hurts other people on this train? Who’s going to believe me over a man in a shirt and tie?” A few seconds later, the train rolled into 42nd street, a large number of people got off and I got a chance to sit in the seat right by the door. He got off too and as he passed me he said “sweet pussy” with a smile on his face. For a long time, I was very angry at myself for freezing. I was angry that I didn’t react, I was angry that I cried. Now, I’ll just share the story with everyone else – maybe it’ll better prepare anyone else this creep might try to get his umbrella on.
To hear more about this man and his kissin’ and hissin’, click here.
“Can I join your itty bitty titty committee?”
Submitted by Jackie
This man was following a woman downtown, saying she should go home with him so they could “do it all night long, yeah baby oooh.” He was faced away from me so I said “excuse me” and as he turned around I said “stop harassing women” and snapped this picture. As I walked away, he said, “That isn’t harassment. This is harassment.” I was faced away but two people walking in my direction gasped loudly, so I can only guess what he did. It felt great!
Submitted by Megan
Two “workers” were slobbering during feeding time in their van parked on East 8th st. in Greenwich Village, today, April 17, 2008. As they shoveled food into their mouths they catcalled several ladies walking by, several of which looked 16.
When I walked by they held down their horn (while slobbering) which startled me, of course a cat call for me wouldn’t do since my brown skin makes me inferior.
The look on their faces tells a lot about them, dumb and dumber and desperate.
UPDATE: I sent a certified mail to the management office of the building and they were not very nice and said there must be a mistake and made excuses for the doorman. He seems to have gotten the message however because he looks away when I walk by – as uncomfortable as it is for me.
NOTE: Julia, who had a similar experience, wrote in with her hollaback: “Since they were stupid enough to harass me in front of their work truck, I noted the business name, called the business, and informed them of what their employees were doing. The employer was extremely nice and very concerned that their employees were doing that. I was told they would be dealt with and was invited to call back the next day so I would know how they were dealt with. It was nice to say my piece – and in this litigious age, I think most employers realize they could get in trouble by their employees behavior and take the appropriate action to correct it.”
I was walking up Hudson at 9:00am this morning wearing a long green bulky overcoat. I guess my mistake was wearing my hair down. I find the “street rules” rather unfair to women of color – I knew it was going to be warm and while there would be caucasian skinned women in their workout clothes walking on in silence (yes it occurs, not nearly as much) as there was in front of me, I would be a target because of my dark hair and skin – and here it goes:
While walking I hear, rather sweetly, “poo see” “poo see” slowly and surely it sinks in. He’s calling me Pussy in a gentle tone without any look of cynacism on his face while driving slowly towards a stop light in front of him.
Normally I’m paralyzed and afraid but I turned and faced him. He looked scared and kind of dumb founded – or maybe that’s just his regular face and rolled up his window as I faced him and his car staring directly at him.
Normally I scream back and hold up my middle finger, or I walk on scared but I have never been approached in this way – usually there is some sort of opener.
Why does this man think calling me a slang term of an area he was born from is okay? What would labeling me a slang genital area do for him, I don’t understand. He was in a business suit.
Submitted by Lisa
First it was “Nice ass”
Then it was “Hey, pretty hair lady!” Over and over.
And last, but hardly least, I was greeted on Marcy Avenue with:
You have a fat (phat?) pussy.
It took a few seconds for the utter nastiness of this comment to register. When it did, I turned around, shot a picture of him. I also shot him the finger. How said chap could see my “fat/phat pussy” through my baggy jeans is anyone’s guess. Maybe he has X-ray vision like Superman?
Submitted by Miss H
I was standing on line at the post office when I notice this creep ogling me. When I didn’t respond to his blatant ogling, he apparently took it as a sign to take it a step further. He leaned creepily close to me and whispered “Hey, little girl… little girl, you look good…” (Mind you I am a grown 20 year old who had half a mind to kick his ass, slap some stamps to his disgusting head, and send him to the nearby dump where I’m sure he would fit right in.) Luckily the line moved forward right as I yelled “Are you fucking kidding me?” I can’t seem to go anywhere without some creep lurking around… and now they’re at the post office too!
Submitted by Cathy
My friend had breastcancer surgery and wore a prosthesis under her bra before she could have the reconstructive surgery. She passed a building site and some of the builders shouted at her, hey love, show us your tits! My friend stopped, turned, grinned at them, then reached inside her bra, took the prosthesis out and waved it at them! She told me the look on their faces was a joy to be seen. I bet they’ll never shout at a woman again!
Submitted by Rena (from Scotland)
I was driving with my daughter when we got to a red light. We notice a truck backing up (with cars behind him) and stops so our car windows meet. It was hot out so our windows were down, and he yells to get our attention. Now he had a boy sitting next to him who looked to be no older than 12. As he catcalls us, I am shocked, but my daughter always quick to think, exchanges a few words with him.
Jerk: Hey mamis, how about you say we go and double date right now, in my pants.
My Daughter: In your dreams perv.
Jerk: What you to good for me? Am I not your type.
Daughter: NO! We don’t date assholes…and you aren’t worth our time.
By then the light changes and we go off, but I remember how horrible that can make you feel, as I am usually with my husband and don’t have to deal with that, but my 16 year old daughter does, who looks younger than she is. She tells me things like that happen to her daily, and it makes me so angry that she can’t go through a day without feeling disrespected. Also the poor boy sitting next to that man (probably his dad) will just learn from him to disrespect women too. It’s unfortunate theres nothing more we can do, but I am so proud of my daughter for speaking up and I encourage every women to do the same, so we can put these assholes in their place!
Submitted by S.