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…by harassing a nice young woman as soon as she sits down next to you in the only free seat, and then telling her you wouldn’t sleep with her if she was the last woman on earth. But that’s what this guy (bottom right, not a great shot) did. And continued to hassle her (“white bitch” “nasty skank” etc.) despite her impressively cool-headed ignoring of him. Then tell “come on baby” as she gets off the train.
So yeah, all you heteroguys out there, take note. The whole sexual harassment pick up strategy doesn’t work so good.
(in the spirit of full disclosure, the woman thought he probably had mental health issues or was drunk/high, but I heard him speaking quite lucidly before she got on)
Submitted by Claire
As I was leaving my house to walk my dog, a passing tan-colored van slowed down in the middle of the street and the male driver (probably in his 40s) stuck his head out the window, looked back at me, and smiled creepily. I looked at him and snapped “What?!” His smile dropped, and he goes (completely expressionless) “Nick rack”, and then drives away. Another passenger in the car simultaneously yelled “Nice…” (something – I couldn’t hear the rest).
Ten minutes or so later, I’m still walking my dog, and the same van drives by AGAIN, with the same dickless creep this time just GLARING at me. I see it go further up the street and slowly turn back onto the street where he’d originally harassed me – it looked like he was pulling over there. I started getting nervous at this point, because that’s where I was headed and it’s the street I live on. I started thinking of what I’m going to do if he’s indeed parked there and waiting for me (I could have turned around, but going the other way would have added another 20 minutes onto my walk, and it was getting close to sunset). Fortunately, he wasn’t there when I got to my street. But I’m so tired of going outside and then wishing I hadn’t left the house at all.
Submitted by Amy
I had experienced so much aggressive harassment over a three day period- men cat calling me as I’m walking toward them and then calling me a bitch and a cunt when I passed them without responding- in my neighborhood, I decided to take a summer scarf and drape it around my shoulders, to cover the bare skin I was revealing by wearing a tank top. It was hot, and I wanted to wear a tank top, but did not think I would make it from my house to the subway without this intense harassment that was making me crazy. As I exited my apartment and attempted to walk down my stairs, I encountered a maintenance man who was also making his way down the stairs in front of me. He saw me, turned to me and smiled and said hello. I smiled back and said hello. He then proceeded to walk down three rows stairs backwards, facing me, looking me up and down the whole time and smiling at me, like we were doing something together. My skin crawled. I couldn’t even say hello to this man without him taking it as some sort of romantic or sexual invitation. As soon as I reached the bottom of the stairs, as he stood there, just staring at me weirdly, I took the scarf that was around my shoulders and wrapped it around my head, almost instinctively. I walked past him quickly with the scarf fully covering my hair, my shoulders and part of my face. It was one of those kind of checkered patterned scarves that some Christian organizations had petitioned Duncan Doughnuts remove from an actress in a commercial last year because they said it had Arab which equaled terrorist connotations or some crazy shit like that. Whatever. I made my way from my apartment to the subway in relative piece that day, with the exception of one young construction worker who actually stepped into my path as I was walking, to make eye contact with me around the scarf, and repeated “hello, hello mommy.”
Submitted by Chavisa
On July 31st I had a dispute on the corner of E 7th St. and 1st Ave. with two truck drivers of Hollywood Dairy LTD. The location of this business is 3190 Rawlins Ave., Bronx, NY 10465. The New York commercial license plate of their truck read: 31228 JT. There were three drivers, two harassed me. I have photos of the truck and the aggressors. I am a woman in my twenties.
I was walking by and one of the drivers hissed at me (familiar to any woman, never appropriate to do this to a stranger, a woman, but there was certainly nothing palliative about his way of hailing this ugly sound at me, his sound effect was in no way mild or naive; it was sharp, accustomed, unmistakably aggressive and disrespectful). I challenged the person who thus disrespected me, I wanted an apology, and he and one of the other men set in on me, insulting and demeaning me in every possible way (mocking my intelligence, sanity, appearance, and investment in the situation. Any bigot surprised to be called out will try to downplay his accuser).
I called the police and was waiting for them to arrive, so I was next to these men without an ally for about twenty minutes, trying to reason, losing my temper, and being ludicrously, sadistically baited. I want these men held accountable. I want Hollywood Dairy held accountable for putting such nuisances on the street to interfere with and to denigrate women. The incident was very upsetting to me. I do not treat people this way, I do not see people in the dehumanizing, small way that could only have allowed them to treat me as they did. Ignorance is unfortunate, but it cannot be an excuse for bigotry and demeaning aggression.
I have contacted various news channels, as well as the police again, and I have left messages for and mailed a long letter to the manager(s) of Hollywood Dairy. Please hold these people responsible (let there be an affecting consequence) for their bigoted behavior that caused me great stress, which I did not deserve. No woman should be taken out of her peace on her own streets.
Submitted by Lia
On account of having been jumped about a month ago, I don’t have a phone (I suppose I could get a new one) but I wish I coulda taken a photo of my new best friends from last night. I’m used to light heckling, especially in summer. “Hey baby can I ride with you?” usually gets you a quick “Sorry, I’m not into men with cars.” Which also usually gets a laugh from passers by. This dude last night. who I really wish I could have photographed, wouldn’t quit though. Weird shit. He said “eenie meani miny moe.” What does that even mean? That and a lot of “you know you look good” lip smacking. I looked hot and tired, because I was. But then the light changed and he drove off and I headed across Atlantic and only realized when I got across that the other cars had all turned and dude was slowing way down to wait for me. Which took it from obnoxious to downright creepy. I wound up backtracking on to the sidewalk to find another way home.
Submitted by Amanda
Thursday morning I was walking back to my house from my boyfriend’s with my bike. As I passed some men working on a building Franklin Avenue at Bergen Street a man standing at the bottom of the scaffolding began to say something inappropriate in reference to riding and biking and me. Most of the cat calling on my street involves the typical “hello beautiful/sweetheart,” but this was more sexually aggressive and explicit. I was a bit stunned, but just continued walking back to my house.
After bringing my bike upstairs, I got ready for work and began to walk back down the street towards the subway. As I approached the construction site again, I readied myself for the same guy to throw some comments at me. I was almost past him when he started saying more inappropriate things (along the lines of the “ooh baby lemme do this and that…” GROSS). At that point i turned around and said “Stop harassing me. I just want to walk down the street without being harassed. It is inappropriate to make those comments and it’s rude. I am not a piece of meat and I should not be treated like one. I am a person too. Don’t ever say anything like that again to me or anyone else!”
What infuriated me the most is that he kept trying to say “Ok, now you have a blessed day ma’am,” while I was telling him off – really condescending! After the fact, I wanted to go back and say, “I will not have a blessed day. NO THANKS, ASSWIPE!”
The worst part is that I’m probably going to see that guy when I walk from my house to the subway in the mornings, and that makes me a little worried. If he thinks it’s ok to say those things to ladies, who knows what else he thinks is ok to do? I hate feeling threatened on the street where I live. ARGH! If this guy continues to bother me, what should I do? Keep on telling him off? Contact the police? Carry pepper spray? Move?
Submitted by GS
Yesterday I was walking home from train and noticed that the jerkoffs were out in full force. These idiots were hanging out by a corner and I knew it was coming. They said a few things and I ignored it. When I crossed the street, I pulled out my cell phone and took a picture. Funny how idiots get so shy when you do this. One guy asked me to take another so he could at least smile and “strike a pose”.
On the same walk, I got harassed by another idiot in a car. I ignored him but when I realized he was not giving up, I pulled out the cell phone again. When I aimed the phone at him, he put his hand in front of his face and said “come on, let’s keep this between me and you”.
Submitted by Kismet
July 16th. Sat in the park on the grass. Man came up and sat behind me and pulled his penis out and stared at me. I responded by yelling at him and leaving.
July 16th. Going into my apartment, man blocked my path and asked me if I was looking to get pregnant tonight. I told him, “No, I’m looking to walk down the street with some amount of dignity. Do you have a problem with that?” Man responded that “Obama is president.” I responded, “ Say something to me when a black woman is president. And then I ranted about rape and harassment. “ Man responded, “I wasn’t trying to start a rap off, I was just playing, sorry. “ Friends stood laughing looking kind of surprised at me.”
July 17th: Man followed me around the good will licking his lips at me. I finally turned to him and yelled “ What?” He did not respond but gave one last gross lip licking look up and down and then left.
July 18th: I sat with a friend at a table outside a café eating a salad. An older Russian man with a cane walked by and stopped in front of my table. He turned to face me, pointed at me then to himself and in broken English said, “ You like to me. I like to you.” I did not respond in anyway. He repeated himself once, louder, and pointed to me and himself again, in case I did not understand. I still did not respond. Then he smiled and waived and kept walking. (I admit, this is not really “sexual harassment.” This is just odd.)
July 19th. Walking down the street. Young man clicks his tongue at me like I am a small animal, says in a very sexual voice, come here cuttie, holds his hand out as I pass in front of him repeating, come here, come here, come here sexy, in high pitched tones…like I am a small animal.
Submitted by Chavisa
I was at Macy’s in Manhattan and this creepy guy made sure that I heard him. He said, “Hot Pussy.”
Submitted by Sabrina
I want to tell you about a disturbing trip on the D line I had the other night. It was really scary. I was coming back from school. As usual I climbed aboard a jam packed train and had to squeeze in front of some people to grab a handle. As I grab a handle I noticed that this guy slid right in behind me and grabbed the same handle. Let me tell you there was no where AT ALL for me to move and I think he knew that.
He was looking at me like a piece of meat looking right at my tits and at my crotch…So he immediately pushes his crotch against my butt. Which has happened to me before…..do they think I am just there for their pleasure??? This guy was all in my business though. Im like 15 and he was at least 30 and strong enough to push me against the other people so I couldn’t move.
This is when it gets worst though. I KNOW he actually pulled out his penis because I the thing poking and literally throbbing as he was grind up on me. The whole time his face was like 1 inch from me. I really felt scared. BUT yes this guy really did it. I think it was him. But a hand started rubbing my crotch too like really rubbing it.. I was too scared to even look back and it could have been someone else too. I heard him sayin stuff like you little rich bitch, do you like you ass fucked? you like you little pussy licked? It was SOOO tight I couldn’t go anywhere.
Anyway he kept going then all the sudden pushed really hard and stopped. Just then he got off the train quickly and I never even really got a chance to see his face. However he did leave a disgusting wad of something on my jeans. I don’t know if it was spit or I HOPE not what I think it was. I have had guys like stare at me and stuff but this was tooo much. I am actually taking the bus for a while…. I was totally degraded and I would have taken a pic but I was like petrified and just tried to shrivel up and go away. I really love your site and I think it is really helping! I wish that creeps piece would fall off. I just wanted to share this with you in case there are other D train victims out there.
Submitted by Krista