Appalachian Ohio, Athens GA, Atlanta, Berkeley, Baltimore, Boston, Chicago, Cleveland, Columbia MO, Columbus, Des Moines, Durham & Chapel Hill, East Lansing, Fredericksburgh VA, Houston, Los Angeles, Muncie IN, New York City, NYU, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Plattsburgh, Richmond VA, San Francisco, Tucson, Twin Cities
Last week I was coming from work at 8 pm and I walked trough the park in the center of my city. It’s almost summer so it was full of people, yet this guy (I think he was my age) told me it was “dangerous for a beautiful girl like me to be alone.” I just kept walking so he would leave me alone, but he followed me for five blocks asking me for my number, wanting to know if I was single, if the food I was carrying was enough for him too and offering himself to be my bodyguard.
I told him that I was not interested, yet he insisted and I told him to leave me alone, he said “don’t be so rude, I just wanted to get to know you” Then I started crying until I finally got to a store that was open and he just went away.
So after this traumatic experience when all I could think while it was happening was “he’s going to rape me or murder me”, I went to Facebook the next day because I needed to talk about it and maybe get some support. I wrote “So yesterday this guy followed me for five blocks after work, why some people can’t accept ‘no’ for an answer? I never had been so scared in my life” and I received answers (all from girls) like “I feel so lucky that I’m not attractive”, “you’re a heartbreaker” “you should have gave him a wrong number and problem solved” and when I responded and said I felt threathened, some “friend” told me I was exaggerating, it wasn’t that big of a deal.
It was a big deal for me, even tho I (like pretty much every female) have been dealing with this since I was 11. I have social anxiety and this is the kind of thing that I just can’t face and I would really like to end forever.
I was walking back to my car down the fairly busy street I live off of, and I was the only person on the side walk. I passed a local Auto College and there were some boys standing on the second level of the dorms. They were all in the dickies uniforms, all had about the same hair cut and one of them yelled down to me: “Hey Gurl, Lemme lick dat butt hole.”
Ladies we don’t do anything to ignite this behavior, it’s a sick way weak guys manipulate a situation to make us feel uncomfortable so they can feel more dominant. On this day I was wearing an oversized flannel on top of my hoodie with black jeans and combat boots.
I didn’t think to take a picture but I did a drawing of the situation.
I was walking through student housing neighborhoods on my way home to my apartment. I was with another female friend and we passed a house at the same moment that five males came out the front door. We were talking and only glanced at the noise, but one of them shouted “Hey sluts!!” to us.
I instinctively turned around to say something but realized a reaction is what they were seeking. So I turned back around and we kept walking. They continued to shout things at us: rude, insulting comments.
I do not care if they were sober or highly intoxicated – it is not an excuse. Who do these people think they are? How could someone possibly think they have the right to speak to a stranger in such an offensive way? The worst part is that that one word will stick with me forever. I am sure they have forgotten about it and will never think about it again. But I will not forget. How it felt to be talked to in such a way. They don’t know me. How dare someone speak to another human being that way. It infuriates me that we live in a world like this.
I am so angry at these monsters that think they can treat women this way. And what’s unbearable is that their goal of seeking control is sometimes, it works. Every time this happens to me, I plan a new route, or avoid going out late at night. When I do this, they have gained control over public space by removing my comfort and feelings of safety in that area. How do I stand up against this while still being safe? I am so incredibly frustrated.
Walking back from the fast station, I refused to give six individuals a cigarette so the group decided to follow me all the way home, all the while being screamed at and threatened. It was horrifying.
I was walking to work from my garage when a car pulled over and the driver, a middle-aged man, rolled down his window to catcall at me. This is soooo not the first time this has happened, even in the last week. But I lost my temper today and I stopped to say bewilderingly “does that work for you?!”
The guy got angry and defensive, shouting about how I wouldn’t pay attention to him otherwise, and I shouted that it was rude and I didn’t want to talk to him, so don’t talk to me. He rolled up his window at that point and drove away, and I continued into work.
It sure would be nice to be able to go a week of the one-block-walk from my garage to my office without this happening.
I was walking to work and a man in a green sweater started talking about my thigh length socks. I told him I didnt want to talk to him and kept walking. He screamed bitch and whore at me as i walked 2 blocks.
I WALKED TWO BLOCKS TODAY!!! I HATE IT. I CRIED AND HAD TO LEAVE WORK. I CANNOT TAKE IT!!!! WHY DO THEY DO THIS?????
My partner (a guy) and I enjoy making and wearing costumes (and in my city there is no shortage of costumed events). For Halloween, I had decided to be a video game antagonist known for the huge helmet he wears. While the helmet covered my entire face and most of my torso, anyone could still tell I was a woman because the rest of the costume was an A-line undershirt and a butcher’s apron over leggings -not skimpy but you could see my shape.
Because I have a good case of bitch-face and a fast aggressive walk, I rarely get hassled in daily life but while I was an anonymous woman wearing a mask on Halloween, I got the most harassment of my life. Even with my guy standing next to me, randoms would come over to touch me (like I was a Real Doll), to tell me how hot I was even though they couldn’t see what I looked like, and when I tilted the helmet to peer at them they would tell me to leave it on, as if I were a fetish object for their pleasure and confronting them with my personhood would ruin their good time.
Even when my partner would intervene they wouldn’t stop trying to pick me up until we relocated. Of course, when we had successfully gotten away from one jerk, another would take his place. It’s not even as if they knew my character! The worst offenders had no idea what I was even supposed to be, only that I was a woman’s body without a visible head. I have never felt so much like a piece of meat in my life. I’ve never been to a Con but think maybe now I know how the women that attend those might feel.
I was walking to go get some coffee in my neighborhood, when some guy driving by yelled “YOU’RE GONNA GET RAPED!!!” extremely aggressively.
It was terrifying and I started crying.
I was waiting for my boyfriend to pick me up after class, near the entrance to the parking lot. I was looking at my phone and into the parking lot, wondering if he had parked and I had not seen him. I wondered around a bit and didn’t see the car, so I started to walk back towards the entrance. As I was walking, a man sitting in a parked truck whistled at me and made some other noises. At first I thought he was calling a DOG, I looked around and then looked at him. He made the same noises along with a come here hand motion. I shook my head and he continued to make the noises and whistle.
I was so offended that he thought it was not only acceptable behavior, but that it would work. I ended up shouting, “I AM NOT A F**KING DOG A**HOLE!” Flipped him off and walked away. Perhaps not the best way to handle the situation, but I was mad. Still makes me mad thinking about it.
At my bus stop a man came up and asked me what school I went to, my name, my age…so I gave him short responses and hoped he would leave.
He got on my bus, sat away for me at first, then moved beside my seat and began making kissy noses at me, snapping fingers, waving hands, trying to get my attention until he grabbed me. I yelled loudly “DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME”. He got off the bus. No one said anything to me. He was on my bus home. I live by him. I was so scared