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I was walking around on Long St. during a sunny afternoon the last day of my 3 month stint in the beautiful country of South Africa. I’d just had a minor operation done, and was enjoying the sunny day. I’m 21, walking on the side-walk minding my own business. I felt someone walking behind me. There was a man, probably 300 feet behind me, walking. For some reason, I had the urge to look behind me… but it seemed normal, I brushed off my intuition. A few seconds later, he ran up behind me, grabbed my bottom, between my legs and bottom, and ran off. I was stunned. I didn’t know if I ought to yell, scream, chase him down, stop, cry, what do I do? I was stunned. I didn’t do anything. I paused for a moment, attempted to digest what happened, scoffed, and kept walking. I was wearing a dress, I was on my period, I felt violated, I was violated. What gave him the right to touch me? What went through his head that made it seem as though that’s okay?
I didn’t tell many people because I didn’t know how I felt about it. I didn’t want people to overreact, I’d dealt with it. I’m okay with it. It happened, it’s over, it doesn’t make me who I am, it doesn’t take away from who I am. It happened, and it’s over. I’m not mad. I’m not sad. I am free, and free from that experience as well.
I’m older now but I was about 10 or 11 and my friend and I were trick or treating one Halloween around our small town with her sister and her friends. My friend and I went a different direction from the rest of the group and decided to meet back at her house, and being a small town which we knew our way around and with a lot of people around; we felt pretty safe.
We were on our way back to my friends house and walking through a neighborhood where most the houses were closed to trick-or-treaters. We walked past this really old, falling apart, shabby house that was the only one on the block with 5 foot high chain link fence surrounded the front yard. An older man (about 60s or 70s) was sitting in a chair on his porch.
We were just going to walk past his house when he called out to us. Being quite young and curious, we stopped to hear what he had to say as he walked towards the edge of his fence to us.
I remember specifically him saying, “Pretty cold out huh?” (Being Halloween in Colorado, it was) and it was at this point where I started to get a really weird vibe off of him. We said yes. Then he proceeded to tell us that he just made some hot chocolate and wanted us to “come on in and drink some to warm up.” And I politely said, “No thank you, we’re just on our way back home.”
He promptly told us that he “like our costumes” and they “looked really cute on us”. My friend by then had gone pretty silent so I told the creepy old guy (who was know leaning over his fence to get closer to us) “thanks, but we really should get going.”
He then started to open the gate to and told us he could walk us home because “you never know what weirdos could be out on Halloween night”. And I politely turned him down and said her house wasn’t too far away. Before he could protest, I grabbed my friends arm and we almost ran down the street.
I’m 16 now it still scares me to walk past his house.
Lets start out by saying that I am 18, and the friends I was with were 17 and 19 and I personally look to be around the age of 15. We were watching street performers at the 16th Street Mall one day when a group of men much older than ourselves walked by. I’m very observant and enjoy watching people so I was looking at them and happened to make eye contact with one of the men. He then gave me a dirty look and turned his head almost as if I was wrong for meeting his eyes. About fifteen minutes later when my friends and I had moved on and began looking for more shops the men came up behind us. My friend, who seemed obviously distressed, asked me if I could hear what they had said. It turns out, that despite them being at least six years our senior, they had made inappropriate comments about my friends short skirt and boots, my tight jeans, and my other friends tank top and shorts. I think it goes without saying I was uncomfortable and a little angry as were both of my friends. None of us were dressed inappropriately for an eighty-some-odd degree day in Denver. The fact that we received several cat-calls and offensive comments about us made me realize that street harassment needs to stop, if only I had had the wits about me to say something to them at at the time.
This is my daughter’s story. When she was 18 she visited Israel with her senior class at her school. Before they left for the Middle East she was told that they all needed to “blend in” as best they could. They needed to wear extremely modest clothing. She is a very light-haired natural blonde, with blue eyes and a very large bust. As they moved through the Arab Market in Jerusalem, she began to hear what she decided was jeering. It was directed at her. The men in the market were following her and throwing large-sized shirts at her (even though she had a loose-fitting, long-sleeved, shirt on;very modest.) She had no choice but to put on the extra shirts because, clearly, she was not covered up enough for them. She was embarrassed and scared. At the same time, these same men were asking to marry her. Making kissing noises and laughing. She was mortified.
I was coming home from a gig at around 1am and there was a car parked next to a bus stop. I didn’t pay much attention to it but as i passed it the guy started driving and asked if i was on business. My immediate answer was “no, sorry”. And as i said it i felt so stupid, why did i put that “sorry” in there, i do hope it’s just because of living in UK the last couple of years and everyone being quite polite and not because some strange subconscious psychological need to apologise for not being a prostitute and leaving the guy unsatisfied, because that would really be sick. This happened yesterday but i still feel kinda dirty, i guess thats the word, why would he even think that i do that. Yes, i admit it, someone assuming i was a prostitute makes me feel bad. No, i have nothing against prostitutes. There is a positive side to this though. I was wearing flat boots, jeans, t’shirt and a cardigan, so yeah, dressed extremely casually, yet got asked the question i got asked. So, those people who think that girls get harassed because they ask for it by wearing a sexy dress and accordingly can be blamed for it themselves, know nothing. I’ve had more unpleasant experiences when im not showing any skin at all than when i am.
Walking to the public library, guy in a satellite truck honked at me. I flipped him off. Walking home, same guy honked again; I flipped him off again; and two other guys-in-vans waved and hollered a few cars later. I’m looking for a third option…like calling their bosses, mothers, proctologists, and child support officers.
This is an online hollaback to a person who probably created a fake profile just for harassment purposes considering his profile name is Jon Smith.
I think he might have seen my post on a feminist pro-body hair fan page called “F*ck Shaving” where women posts pictures of their hairy selves. I posted something like this article, although I cant find the one I actually posted, on pubic hair and received the message that I screen shot and attached here.
I am a women’s studies major, so I know a bit about our patriarchal society and how it produces attitudes about women like this person must have, but it still catches me off guard when people have the audacity to send harassing messages like these. I’m probably not in any real danger, but this messages reminds me of the sort of sexism people are capable of. And now I’m going to make sure that my privacy settings don’t allow anyone who isn’t my friend see what city I’m in…
Today I was at my local indoor pool, looking after the two young boys I nanny for. While in the hot tub, I noticed two older boys, probably around age 13 or 14. The boys seemed to recognize one of the kids I was caring for from school, but he seemed very wary of them, as the way they were acting was very loud, aggressive, and in-your-face. The entire time we were there, they kept ogling my breasts, and I could feel their eyes on my back when I stood up. Both of the older boys had googles and snorkels with them, and kept going underwater and not-so-subtly pressing on my ass with their entire torsos as they swam by. The first time it happened, I was like, “Well, I’m sure that was just an accident… I mean, the undertow from the jets in the hot tub IS pretty strong, he could have easily swum astray and bumped into me”. The second time I was like, “Yeah… his hand just brushed my crotch… Undertow definitely doesn’t force someone to do that…”. Just when I thought it was over, one of them came around a third time when I wasn’t looking and rubbed up hard against me. While he was underwater and pressing me, I made eye contact with the other one (he had a big grin on his face) and the little shit knew exactly what was happening, disgusting little pervert. When the groper came up for air after the third time, I gave him a look that said, “You touch me again and I’ll kick your fucking teeth out” and they just laughed, like my anger and disgust at them was hilarious. After their laughter died down and they looked ready to pull the same shit again, I grabbed the kids, gave the older boys a cold look, and said, “You know exactly what you were just doing. Don’t be such dicks.” They looked surprised that I had cursed at them, but laughed again anyways. I left feeling disgusted and appalled that boys so young already had such poor impulse control and such a lack of respect for women’s bodies and feelings. When things like this happen to me in my own community, and in a public place, it makes me feel certain that today’s brazen and shameless groper is tomorrow’s perpetrator of rape.
Yesterday, I was lucky enough to leave the office a little earlier than usual. Leaving work, I hop on the metro, and once I arrive at the metro station, I have to take a bus home. Unfortunately, the bus drops me off at the bottom of a large hill, so I have a 10 minute walk home everyday. As I began my journey up the street, a man in a car with darkened windows drove past me, slowly, and rolled down his window. He literally stopped his car in the middle of the road, and waited until I caught up. As I passed, he stuck his head out the window and stared at me, looking me up and down. I instantly felt uncomfortable, and walked away quickly. Then, when I thought the man had driven away, I noticed that he has turned around in someone’s driveway, and was driving past me again, going less than 5 mph. He shouted something out the window at me and stopped in the road again. Fear rushed over me and I grabbed my pepper spray. The man continued to follow me, driving slowly, until a car drove up behind him, and he sped away. I should NEVER have to fear for my safety walking home, especially in broad daylight. I am lucky the situation was not a lot worse than it was.
I walked through a group of 30 year old men, and when they said hello, i returned the greeting, and immediately after i did a different man began shouting “you got some nice titties” over and over until his friend chimed in “and a real nice ass”