Appalachian Ohio, Athens GA, Atlanta, Berkeley, Baltimore, Boston, Chicago, Cleveland, Columbia MO, Columbus, Denver, Des Moines, Durham & Chapel Hill, East Lansing, Fredericksburgh VA, Houston, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, Lubbock TX, Manhattan KS, Muncie IN, New Orleans, New York City, NYU, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Plattsburgh, Richmond VA, San Fernando Valley, San Francisco, SUNY Oneonta, Tucson, Twin Cities
I was walking through the parking lot with a female friend and a couple of guys followed us, demanding that we give them a hug. We said no and they kept saying “Come on, give us a hug!” They followed us until my friend said something to another guy we were passing, telling him that the guys following us needed help. He started talking to them and it provided enough of a distraction for us to be able to walk the rest of the way to our car without them bothering us any further.
I’m 18 years old and a 16 year old coworker at my job thinks it’s hilarious to call me “babe” and always comments on how I look. He once said “what are you doing after work? Oh wait I already know, you’re coming home with me”. I used to think it was funny, but it’s become an everyday occurrence. Myself and my other female coworker have told him to stop and that it’s harassment, but he says he’s “just kidding”. I’m not laughing anymore. It’s unprofessional and makes me feel unsafe.
Earlier today I was walking to my friends house and I had my music playing, I only had one headphone in so I could hear my surroundings. I am a generally anxious person while walking alone at night. As I was walking I could hear in the distance some guys yelling across the street. “HEY! YOU!” And I quickly sped up to avoid any triggers. I walked as fast as I could and they continued. These men started to follow me and call weird
I was walking the one and half blocks from my house to my favorite bar when a man in a car starts slowly driving next to me. He’s yelling at me ‘Hey’, but I’m not paying attention because I rarely do. He goes “HEY RED! Do you drive a Volvo?” I just said yes and kept walking, my naivety wanted to believe he was going to tell me someone had hit my car or something, but of course not. He said “I thought that was you. You beautiful.” He was still following me in the car and all I could think was that if he saw me in my car probably meant he saw me get out of my car and go into my house or at least where my house was.
I didn’t say anything, but he continued, “I’m just trying to be nice, smile Red, you gotta boyfriend? I can make you smile.” All things I did not want to hear. Again I said yes and kept walking. At this point he said something else and sped off and I ran into the bar. I’ve had a lot of experiences with walking down the street and men telling me to smile or saying I have a killer body, I’ve had a guy riding a bike come up behind me and grab my ass. It is not something that happens once a month or even once a week. It’s every single day. It happens at 9am and it happens at 3 am. It happens when I’m wearing jeans and it happens when I’m wearing a tight dress. It happens when I’m alone and it happens when I’m with my friends. It happens all the time and it’s so inappropriate. If I’m in the middle of a conversation with my friends and you holler at us and we don’t respond it’s not because we’re being rude, it’s because we’re in the middle of a conversation and either didn’t hear you and don’t want to talk to strangers who are yelling at us. I do not want to go home with you, I do not want you to come home with me. I will never meet someone on the street and hear “damn that ass” and think “THIS IS A MAN I WANT TO TAKE HOME WITH ME AND FUCK.” Because that’s all they want. They don’t want me. They don’t want to hear me talk about my love of cooking or how much I’d wish for the Doctor to come take me away in the Tardis. They won’t debate with me if continuity errors in super hero movies make it a bad movie. In short they aren’t what I want and they should go and try and find women who can stand their sorry asses or even better learn how to treat and talk to women like they’re you know human beings and not objects for their fantasy. I dress well and I take care of myself, but for me certainly not for you.
Walking down the street and got a “hey baby” from this fine gentleman.
I worked on the street as a sign twirler for a furniture store, right on a corner that was known to have really long traffic lights. It was Summer in Arizona, so I wore a white T-shirt and midi-shorts (normal summer attire, not dressed indecently). Traffic was stopped and the car next to me was full of men. They rolled down their windows and catcalled for a while, and one of them attempted to douse my shirt with his drink (my WHITE T-shirt). When I didn’t respond, they cursed at me, saying I was an uptight prick and threw food at me. I was underage, trying to earn extra money for college. I felt so demeaned and uncomfortable that I quit my job, and when I told my boss why, he told me I was making too big a deal out of things.
Riding my bicycle this man yelled “titties!” I was enjoying my ride and then felt embarrassed and unsafe.
This man driving a truck honked at me and entire half a block. I ignored him until I turned the corner and he just leered at me. I was wearing a skirt and feeling beautiful and he made me feel shameful and frightened.
My girlfriend and I were going to buy liquor when we heard the people in the apartment above the liquor store having a party. They made a joke about our appearance when we walked in and when we left with our purchase, one guy yelled, “Want to party?” We both said, “No thanks. ” He yelled, “Don’t be a bitch; I was trying to be nice, bitch!” I told them to eff off, but I shouldn’t have to be harassed because I’m a lesbian buying a product below an apartment.
I work at an elementary school as an after school teacher. On my way to work I get cat called and honked at every single day. I thought that work would be one place I could escape being harassed until one day I was wearing some boldly patterned pants and as I walked by one of the school staff, he asked me if he could “…watch me walk away in those pants.”
I walk my students to swim lessons once a week. Half way through the school year, the father of a student decided to join us. I was relieved to have the help of one more adult until he began flirting with me and asked me out on a date while at the EXACT same time the swim instructor sits on the opposite side of me and also flirts and asks me out. Although, nothing degrading was said by the last 2 men, they put me in very uncomfortable positions when my focus was supposed to be on my young students, doing what I was paid to do.
Instead, I had to spend the rest of the school year consciously avoiding all three of these men- mindfully dodging and carefully navigating myself throughout campus to protect myself and the job I cared so much for.
No one should have to deal with this on the street or at work. 100% of my attention should’ve been on my students, not avoiding harassment.