I have lived in this area for years and have been out late at night a significant amount of time since I used to work nights as a pedicabber downtown. I have been harassed verbally and physically numerous times at work but I was always in a position to end an interaction by kicking a fare off my cab or simply riding away. Last night I was groped while taking a walk in my neighbourhood. Somehow this was a much more violating experience.
I was only about two blocks from home when I encountered a man passing me in the opposite direction on the sidewalk. It was late and I was alert but as we passed one another he casually reached out and squeezed my left breast. Surprised by the casualness and shaken by the violation I turned and yelled something like “What the F- dude!?” He continued walking without looking back. I called my fiancé, who was at home, and he came to meet me as I walked the suddenly unsafe feeling two blocks home.
I have been bothered by the fact that I felt fearful and violated in this situation and not as much in the past. Now I see it is the unknown factor of what that man intended, what he could have done after that caused me such fear. Also, now I have a deep sadness that the neighbourhood I have felt safe in for so long suddenly seems more sinister.
Just now I was waling home and as I went through the lobby a man followed me in. Not recognising him I asked him what floor he was going to, he replied 4th and walked into the lift with me. As he walked out of the lift he tried to kiss my breasts and I stabbed him in the neck with my fingernail. I was so enraged I nearly walked out to try and beat him up but luckily my flight response kicked in and he didn’t try to follow me further.
Today I was walking home, and I was about three houses away from my own. I heard footsteps approaching behind me, so I turned to see a boy, probably around 17 years old, jogging up behind me. I thought it was odd, but assumed I was being paranoid, so I turned back around, as I swung my backpack in front of me to get my keys out. Then, I felt him grab my behind, very forcefully. I swung my backpack around to hit him as he jogged to the other side of the street and screamed at him as loud as I could to get away from me. I repeated this again. He said something to me in Spanish at that point, and proceeded to the other side of the road where I think he walked/jogged quickly around the upcoming corner. I just wanted to be inside, so I ran up to my front door and inside. I’m so angry that this happened just outside of my home. I feel totally violated, and unsafe.
I’ve been grabbed full frontal in the crotch in a nightclub and at a carnival – where the men could get away quickly and disappear into the crowds afterwards. I felt so angry and powerless, but also disturbed – it was so intrusive that both times it felt like it could be a warm up for something even more sinister.
I was on a busy 4 train uptown and it was very crowded after work. An guy started rubbing his finger over my crotch area. At first I thought it was an accidental brush but he then did it again, I moved back slightly but couldn’t move much. I imagined that I was misreading the situation but then his finger ran up and down the length of my penis in my jeans. I was so shocked and embarrassed I didn’t know what to do, the train pulled into 86st and he got off quickly and I couldn’t see him. I was reluctant to tell a member of staff or police because I was embarrassed – I thought I would share on here to see if this has happened to anyone else because this guy can’t continue to get away with this.
Last Thursday night I was driving home from my boyfriends at about 11PM and stopped to get petrol on the way back. As I left my car I noticed a guy staring at me with a particularly strange expression. I chose to ignore it and carried on to get cash from the ATM and then walked into the shop to pay for my petrol. Inside I saw him again. He looked at me with the same smiling, (off putting if I’ll admit it) expression. I stepped away to allow him to get to the counter before me and turned my attention to the confectionery stand. While I was hunched over I felt someone slap my ass and turned around shocked to see the same man giving me the same, hollowing gap-toothed goofy looking laugh/smile as before. Initially I was in shock. Did this really happen? What had just happened? I am the type of person to stick up for myself but could barely fathom a decent platform as to stick up for myself on. Then I was angry, hurt. I could feel the imprint of his hand there on my bottom for hours later. Am I over reacting? Is this all silly? I can see the vile expression in his face stuck in my memory. I don’t know what has upset me more though – the fact it happened or the fact the security guard or server behind the til in the shop barely flinched or said and did nothing. Surely this is wrong? I just worry if the individual thinks this is ok to do in public, in front of several others then what else would he do in privacy, away from prying eyes? Do I inform the police as I’m sure it’ll be caught on CCTV or do I just let it go? I’m torn to decide as it’s such unfamiliar territory. Also I was extremely tired and feeling extra vulnerable at the time so I’m not sure if I just over reacted or not.The advice online for these type of situations in really disappointing tbh. I’m so upset and confused. Why do people think this is OK behaviour????
My husband and I went to Istanbul for a one year anniversary trip. We rode the tram everywhere, which was mostly great, but one day it was especially crowded. I clung tightly to my husband (he’s very tall, no way you can miss him). I felt something on my leg and thought it was the guy next to me’s hand, so I shifted. Then I felt it in between my butt cheeks and realized he had a boner and was pressing his bulge into my butt. I have actually experienced this before, it’s called Frotteurism, but I couldn’t believe it was happening again. I told my husband what was going on, but he thought I was just complaining about it being crowded. So I shifted and jabbed my elbow into his sternum and started talking loudly about what a frotteur is and how disgusting it is. But my husband just got embarrassed that I was making a scene. We got off the train and had a huge fight, but once he realized what had actually happened, my husband felt incredibly ashamed that he didn’t believe me and that he did nothing. We’re working through it but it feels like 2 kinds of trauma at the same time.
It was around 6 pm here in my city in PH. My friends and I were waiting for a public transport where all of a sudden a man groped my behind with two hands, one for each cheek. I was already having a bad day and this made it way worse. I was too shocked to react and when it finally registered in my brain, the man was already running with his obnoxious friends. I felt violated of all sorts. This happened about a year ago. Now, I’m currently working in my undergrad thesis and chose street harassment as my topic. Filipinos aren’t keen on street harassment. I grew up learning to just adapt it and accept that it will happen every now and then. It is now time to instill awareness to my folks. My resources are very limited and finding this site is like locating a treasure chest filled with gold and all priceless jewels. Thank you.
I was at the beach reading and a guy was sat 50ft away from me, after a while he came over and started chatting to me, I didn’t really want to be bothered so tried to be polite but kept my answers brief. He asked if he could come and sit by me so I said “you can if you want but I’m just reading my book” hoping he would take the hint. He came and sat by me and we chatted, my birthday was coming up and I said I wasn’t thrilled about it as I was turning 30 and he reached out and stroked my shoulder and said I didn’t look 30. I felt uncomfortable with it and know now I should have said something then but I didn’t as it was an isolated beach and we were the only people there, I wanted to make my excuses and leave as soon as possible. After a bit more chatting and obviously encouraged by me not saying anything when he first touched me he started stroking my waist and making comments, at this point I felt very uneasy and said “look just because I said you could come sit by me doesn’t mean you can touch me” he stopped and we sat awkwardly for a while then I said I had to go. When I got home I felt disgusting, stupid and vulnerable.
My first groping. I don’t remember where I was, it was 11 years ago, but the rest is clear. I was 6 years old, walking with my mom and I fell behind as I often did. It was very crowded and people were everywhere. One man walked by me with the creepiest smile on his face. “Hey, baby girl, nice ass” He said, then groped my butt very harshly and laughed. I was shocked and froze for a moment before turning around to see him disappear into the crowd. I ran ahead to catch up with my mom and didn’t fall behind for the rest of the day, but I never said anything.