Appalachian Ohio, Athens GA, Atlanta, Berkeley, Baltimore, Boston, Chicago, Cleveland, Columbia MO, Columbus, Des Moines, Durham & Chapel Hill, East Lansing, Fredericksburgh VA, Houston, Los Angeles, Muncie IN, New York City, NYU, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Plattsburgh, Richmond VA, San Francisco, Tucson, Twin Cities
I was sat on the bus on the way home from work and felt a guy sit on the seat across the aisle from me. I picked up a weird vibe from him but I didn’t look up because I could sort of tell that I he wanted me to somehow? Anyway after about 10 minutes he taps me and passes me his phone and said read this I glanced at it and read enough passed it him back and he said no read it or I can read it to you so I took the phone took a photo passed it back and gave him a dressing down so everyone saw.
One late night I was on my way home from work and was waiting on my next bus. As I was getting off the bus I took to the terminal I failed to notice a man had said something to me because of my earbuds in my ear. I quickly realized the man was following me.
I ignored him. I sat down on a bench and waited. The man shortly approached the bench I was sitting at and sat down. He then continually tried to initiate conversation with me even after I politely told him I was not interested.
He said things like “You’re are so beautiful.”,”You have a nice body.”, “Can I have your number? Can I give you mine?” He continued to move closer to me while asking questions while I was clearly uncomfortable. He even at one point touched my shoulder, put his face directly in my face and said “You different, not like other girls.”
Finally my bus came and I was relieved that I was free of him. But then I noticed him getting on the same bus I was. No big deal. That could’ve been a coincidence. But as the bus ride went on I noticed he wasn’t getting off. I live a ways away from my bus terminal and usually late at night I’m one of the last people on the bus. So I get on my phone in a panic that I’m being followed and call my mother. While I’m having this panicked conversation with my mother I get closer to my home. A block away from my apartment there is a gas station and after hearing my panic my stalker gets off the bus and a walks straight into the gas station. On the route to my home there were numerous gas stations on the way for this man to have gone into. I don’t know for sure if he was following me but I don’t know many people who travel across cities late at night just to get to a particular gas station. It was one of the most terrifying and violating situations I ever experienced.
I’ve been walking my young daughter to school in the morning, as the new year just began. Each day, either on the way there, or the way home, a man all but breaks his neck, eyes nearly popped out of his head to STARE at me as I stroll along trying to convey my disapproval with glaring back at him. What’s worse, is that this nonchalant pervert does this while driving a carload of his own children to and from school! Today, the sixth day of school, the disgusting halfwit drove up behind us, and involved his boys with catcalling from within the protective womb bubble of his car! My little daughter was so confused, “Why are they yelling at you like that mommy?”
“Because he thinks he can get away with it, and unfortunately, some men were brought up believing women are really soulless sex objects, incapable of being fully human, outside of unwelcome sexual objectification”
I didn’t knock on the door to have words with his wife/girlfriend or whatever either oblivious or uniformed female counterpart he managed to deceive into thinking he was even remotely worthy of being called a man (or simply prey on the fact she was born into a society where women are expected to put up with it to prevent a rape, murder, or worse… accept the myth that men were created this way, and that this shockingly prevalent societal crime is somehow normal). So, I took a picture of the license plate on his red Toyota Camry!
Yesterday I was standing outside of my residence hall talking on the phone, when a group of three guys started catcalling at me. I tried to ignore them but they wouldn’t stop, so I flipped them off. One of them just laughed at me, and they walked away. Later on, I realized that one of the guys was friends with my roommate. I don’t think he realized it was me when he decided to harass me (he was far enough away that I couldn’t really see his face), but I was shocked to find that someone who had seemed so nice could be so crude and obnoxious.
Today, I was riding my bike to class when some guy yelled “hey foxy” at me. I’m pretty irritated with feeling like I’m on display for people who only see me as an object for their viewing pleasure. I hate feeling scared when I pass guys I don’t know on the street, fearing that they could do something to make me feel uncomfortable or unsafe.
I work as a cashier and about half the men who come through my line call me “honey,” “baby,” “sweetie,” etc. because I’m a young girl.
Worse, though, when I was sixteen and had just started my job, I was selling the store’s debit/credit card to a man in his mid-forties. He replied, “Well I’ll get one if you give me a kiss.” I was speechless. How did he think he had the right to say that to me?
I almost got caught by the city parking enforcement for not switching my car over. I ran outside before he got out of the car and yelled that I was leaving soon, but just switched it over and went back in my apartment. When I was about to leave for good, the parking enforcement guy had pulled his car around behind mine and was leaning against his car. I asked him if he was still going to give me a ticket. He told me no, he wanted to talk to me and then proceeded to hit on me, saying he likes curvy girls and that I have a nice butt. He also asked if I was seeing anyone. I didn’t know what to say so I just said yes and thanks and ran back inside.
Asked me to stop when I walked from bus stop to my home, but then it he whispers “sex” and tried to get me into some house by the street.
For the past two days, construction workers have been refurbishing the facade of a hotel that I pass on the way to my bus stop. Each time I have passed the building, both going and coming home from school and work, I have been whistled at and cat-called by the workers.
I looked up the number for the hotel and asked to speak with a manager. The woman who picked up the phone tried to convince me that I had the wrong hotel, and that no construction workers were working on the building any more. I did not back down. The hotel manager then tried to intimidate me into giving him a description of the man so he could reprimand him. I let him know that I did not entertain my street harasser’s inappropriate behavior by approaching him alone in a parking lot. I then told him that he is responsible for the behavior of his employees, and that it should be a policy for all of his workers not to engage in such inappropriate conduct. The manager told me he would discuss the incident with his workers. I plan on following up with him.
A man was insisting/commanding that a woman tell him her name, calling her Shorty, while she was waiting at a crosswalk.
This was the first time I’ve ever witnessed street harassment that I can remember. As someone, myself an androgynous male, who’s been harassed/abused/stalked I wanted to help this person but felt confused and scared. If you’re reading this, I’m sorry that I didn’t do more than pause and glare at him while he wasn’t looking, I hope you’re ok.
Dear Hollabackers –
Check out what’s shaking with the global movement this week:
Hollaback! Gent had a press release demanding more initiatives on raising awareness about homophobia in Gent. They got some press coverage and received an invitation from the Alderman for Equal Opportunities to come and discuss their forthcoming LGBT action plan for the city!
Hollaback! Boston successfully got a company to take down offensive ads on their MBTA trains after launching a campaign on social media and in the press. They continued their “Introducing!” series with a post introducing Lily! They also announced their involvement in a coalition to ELEVATE Boston for the upcoming Boston mayoral election.
Until next week!
HOLLA and out –