Appalachian Ohio, Athens GA, Atlanta, Berkeley, Baltimore, Boston, Chicago, Columbia MO, Des Moines, Durham & Chapel Hill, Fredericksburgh VA, Houston, Los Angeles, Muncie IN, New York City, NYU, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Richmond VA, San Francisco, Tucson, Twin Cities
One afternoon a few years ago when I was living downtown I was bringing groceries in through the back door of my apartment building and some guy, very scruffy and obviously drunk, came up behind me put his hand between my legs and squeezed. He was a with a woman who did nothing about this behavior. It was daylight and I was in a back alley way. It was so disgusting.
The last two days I have been honked at and hollered at while walking my dog. Can’t I just take her on a walk and not be bothered?
A few weeks ago I was traveling through the Amtrak station in Sacramento, late at night and found myself in a scary situation.
The station and platforms are connected by covered walkways and tunnels which are very creepy after dark. When I got off the train the conductor made a point of recommending that I head immediately to the station rather than waiting on the platforms. She knew that there would be men loitering on the platforms and that it would be dangerous or uncomfortable to wait there.
It takes a few minutes to get to the station and once I was in the tunnels I ended up alone with one group of passengers almost out of sight ahead and another group lagging behind—and this is when the guys who were hanging around started following me. One man followed me on the bike and then circled around me, making comments, telling me to smile and come with him. “Where are you going?” “Talk to me.” “Smile for me.” As I walked quickly towards the station and tried to brush him off he kept riding circles around me while four of his friends walked behind us and laughed. I felt trapped by the five of them and didn’t see anyone around who could have helped me if I confronted them.
I was able to shake them off when more passengers from the train caught up with us and was relieved to get to the station. There, a second conductor was advising women traveling alone or with young kids to walk to the platform in a large group or ride with him to avoid trouble.
It amazes me to think that this is a well known problem that has not been dealt with!! I wrote to Amtrak asking for information on this TWO WEEKS AGO but have had no response
— so what do I do next?
So I was at a hotel with family and we all decided to go to the pool they have there. It was pretty warm and for my coverup over my bathing suit I wore a pair of shorts and and a tank top. My mother and I were walking through this hotel (which is expensive as heck) and this boy probably about 15 whistles at me as I walk by.
I look and and his FATHER was right there standing by there and as I wait for him to reprimand him he instead high fives him and smiles at me. Which just goes to prove that harassment comes in all walks of life. Plus, I am only 13 years old.
A few days ago I was walking and minding my own business when two men did that “walk into her path” thing. You know the one, where they force you to walk into them or get you in a spot where it’s very easy to grab at you?
So to my left is a wall so I had to really work to not walk into them. They kept eye contact the whole time and tried to grab me. I pushed one of them (the one closest to me was about to reach for me) and yelled at them (I was furious, this is not the first time I’ve been in this situation, this same thing happened with one big man just a few months ago) and they just laughed at me! I can only assume they were laughing at what little power I had in the situation.
It makes me feel like it’s time to walk around with the mace cocked and loaded. I’m tired of being nice and doing the extra work to avoid these assholes. I am so SO angry and tired of this kind of thing. Whenever I choose to leave the house alone I have a 90% chance of being harassed. It’s ridiculous and infuriating.
So I’m sitting in the airport right after leaving the holla:revolution conference and site leaders retreat – I’m a site leader in Canada – and this man chats me up while I’m picking out some Doritos cause I’m hungry as shit. Dude tells me I have amazing eyes and wonders if I’m an actress. I say no and walk away. Like most fools, he persists only to be told that he should avoid making comments about things people can’t change like their eye colour. Everyone around me claps
A few nights ago I was coming from the French Quarter where I was picking up my medicine. I got on the bus home, but then thought I got on the wrong bus and got off too early (I moved here 3 weeks ago). Immediately an older man (I am 20) said “You look like you’re lost, baby.” He then followed me for 15 minutes until I called my mom telling her what cross streets I was at each time I reached cross streets.
I was terrified, and couldn’t help but wonder what would have happened if my mom was at work?
I go to a “barcade” quite frequently. I usually go there tuesday nights and stay until closing. I can usually walk to my car, by myself, without being bothered. I usually only ask one of my friend to come with me if I parked farther away than usual. (I shouldn’t even have to do that, but women learn to fear the night. This is part of it)
One night when I was leaving, I was only parked a block away. There were three guys next to my car, but I didn’t think anything of it at first. I don’t normally fear groups of men right away. I was crossing the street when one shouted, “HEY, BABY! COME HERE!” I instantly panicked and walked inside another bar that was just about to close. That man was standing right next to my car, my escape, when he shouted at me. (good thing he didn’t know it was my car!) I told the bartender and another older gentleman what happened. They were disgusted, and the other older guy walked me to my car. The men were gone, but I was still scared, still paranoid.
For a few weeks, I had at least one of my friends (usually male. most of my friends are guys) walk me to my car even if it was a block away. I feared groups of strange men for a while, no matter what time of the day it was. I told them what happened, and they understood why I was scared, even though many of them are men, so they have never experienced the same kind of harassement. I know I’m not alone in experiencing this. My female friends have told me their stories too.
I’m lucky to have friends around me for support, and I’m lucky to know so many guys who understand that this is not right. The only thing is is that many of us don’t know what we can do about it. Now, thanks to you, there’s a way we can fight back!
The last two times I have gone on my usual running route (at different times of the day) I have been passed by the same guy on a bicycle who has made me very uncomfortable, the first time he slowed right down as he went by me and stared at me nodding and smiling for 30-40s before cycling on when someone came. The second time there were more people around and he slowed down and waved at me. It made me extremely uncomfortable and no longer feel like running outside.
I got out of the train station (in my hometown) and as I was walking on a main street, (my car was parked across the parking lot a block away), I saw a pickup truck slowly see me then make a right turn INTO the parking lot. I didnt think anything of it, but I was aware. I saw he made a stop (near where you purchase tickets) so I was alarmed because I only remember seeing the driver alone in the car.
Long story short he made a u-turn around the parking lot, parked for a few moments and as I walked passed him, he pulled up behind me, fucking following me! I panicked, called my mom and walked fast. As fast as I could I went inside my car and locked the doors. I tried to contain myself and saw he passed by me and I left my parking spot and got his license number and car information.
I called the cops but when they spoke to me they said there wasnt really anything they could do because “he only followed me, he didnt talk to me or anything just lurking around in his car, maybe he was just being a pervert.” They had his information, but they couldn’t really stop and question him. This is awful and it pisses me off, I wanted to share with you all my story.