Rebecca’s story: I was harassed… by a woman.

I was visiting my friend a University of Missouri and we went to a party. Me and my friends were pretty much the only ones dancing so when a strange girl came up and started dancing with me, I was happy that she was joining us. However, she then proceeded to bite me on my neck. Very hard. Shocked I just walked away. I told my friends and they thought it was just as weird as I did and we all kind of laughed at it. Later, I was standing against the walk talking to my boyfriend when she came up to me again. I said to her in a light but firm way “Don’t bite me again, because that really hurt!” She, of course, bit me again. I then tried to slink away but she had me pinned against the wall and started drunkenly pressing herself into me. She touched my breasts. My boyfriend then grabbed my armed and pulled me away.
It was such a weird thing and only now, reading this site, do I realize I totally underreacted. Of course, if a man had done this to me, not only would I have fought back, but my boyfriend would defended me. I was so worried about not hurting her feelings or making it seem like a big deal that I forgot about my self respect. This will never happen again, whether by a man or a woman.

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2 Responses

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  1. Enna says:

    Re Rebecca’s story. Because it is more common for men to harrase women rather than a woman to do it to another woman (she must have been drunk) you were caught by even more surprsie. I thought what you said was spot on “don’t bite me it hurts!” If she didn’t listen (because she was so drunk) then at least you tired to be polite and resolve the issue and didn’t start a fight – the drunk lady could have been trying to do that.

    It’s interesting, if a man bit you your boyfirend would be “entitled” to pull him off – but as it was a woman he couldn’t lay a finger on her: due to social standards that men “must” protect their women from other men but it is wrong for a man to defend himself or girlfriend from a woman. Personally I think he should be allowed to respectfully pull the woman away a little to allow you to escape as she was hurting you.

  2. Shaun says:

    It’s great that you realise the hypocracy of the situation when the gender roles are reversed, and that you automatically gave a female different treatment – i.e sexism.

    As an aside, as a man, I don’t care if it’s man or woman if someone attacked my girlfriend (who is the nicest, kindest sweetest girl I’ve ever met, with absolutely no malice in her whatsoever), I would defend her. We can’t have gender equality if we make special exceptions.

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