Maggie’s Story: “He’s not going to take advantage of me like that again without a fight”

I know this site is mainly for street harassment, but I really needed to get this off my chest.  Last summer, my brother, a family friend, and I were watching a movie while our parents were out. I put a blanket over me because it was cold. The family friend was sitting next to me and started trying to hold my hand. I leaned over and whispered that we were just friends. Because I mean, I’ve held hands with plenty of people that I wasn’t romantically involved with, so I didn’t think it was too big a deal. Just kind of awkward, you know? But then he started rubbing my legs and before I could even say anything his hands were under my shirt and I didn’t know what to do because my little brother was right there. It was so awful.
Luckily, my Mom walked in before it got any worse. Of course, she didn’t notice anything because of the blanket.
I told her about it just last week, because I’m having to see him again this summer. She told me it wasn’t my fault but she acted like it was okay for him to touch me like that when I know it isn’t. I’m really scared that he will try to touch me again this summer.
I will fight back this time though. He’s not going to take advantage of me like that again without a fight.

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3 Responses

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  1. Kathleen says:

    As soon as this family friend arrives, talk to him with your mother present. Tell him that you do not want him to touch you, hold hands with you etc., and that you have spoken with your parents to make sure your wishes are known. Ask your parents to back you up: if he violates this agreement he will be asked to go home and he will not be asked back while you are there. Friends respect the wishes of their friends.

  2. Amy says:

    Hon, if you tell him not to touch you again and he does, forget what your mother says and you call 911! What he did was sexual assault and you do not deserve that or have to take it. If you have to see him again, tell him that you did not want him to touch you last summer and that he is not allowed to put his hands on you for any reason. If he does, call the police, seriously. There is no reason for you to have to be afraid or intimidated in your own home. I hope you feel better about this.

  3. gredma says:

    i know what this is like, family friends that do this cause confusion. you feel like maybe you’re crazy. when you explain what happened, the word “awkward” seems to replace the word “fear”
    you shouldn’t be made to feel awkward=scared
    i’m glad that you feel strong enough to stand up to him next time. please do it, knowing other young women support your courage to say no.
    also, probably confront him in front of your mom, calmly and honestly, so he knows OTHERS are aware. just out of concern for your safety, hun. best of luck <3

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