Kristin’s Story: Perverted stalker

A couple years ago I was living in Victoria and was going downtown to meet a friend for a show. I was probably 17 at the time, but my round face, short stature and plain clothes made me look 14 tops. My dad intended to drive me straight to the theatre, but I was thirsty so I asked him to drop me off at 7-Eleven so I could get a drink (he was uncomfortable, but since I was only a few blocks away from where I was going, I told him I’d be fine). When I came out of the convenience store there was a creepy man loitering outside, staring at me.  He got fairly close and stepped in front of me, glaring unapologetically at my chest. He told me my “necklace” was pretty, and asked if he could get a closer look at it.  He kept inching closer and it was obvious he intended on touching/molesting me. I smiled politely (an instinctual reaction), said “no thanks”, and went on walking. As I walked away he continued asking me if he could take a closer look at my necklace, and once I’d put enough distance between us to deter him from talking to me, he continued to follow in silence. He stalked me for two blocks until I finally met up with my friend, then he left. I told my friend what had happened, and we awkwardly laughed about it before brushing it off and going on with our night.

I find it disturbing that someone would behave like this towards someone who was so obviously underage, and uninterested.


4 Responses

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  1. Chris says:

    I am a guy. I can’t imagine fully what you all feel, but I do recall times riding a bicycle when people in cars make obnoxious comments – Makes you want to “go postal”. To lend some sympathy though, I must say I have an incident from the 1980s: I was a sophomore at Michigan State University, on a floor with some of the varsity hockey players. This was the dsys before caller ID. Each room had a phone directory of students in the dorms. One of the hockey a-holes was picking female names at random and harrassing them. I (30 years later 🙁 ) still remember one: Is this Cheryl Cocking (her real name)? Cocking as in f***ing? As in me sticking my *** up **** ***? I’m going to get you tonight b****! We were a group of guys. Even though I was fairly sure there would be no follow-through, I imagined the violation she must have felt 🙁 It was a whole group of guys. Sadly, I didn’t have the guts to do anything but leave. Thanks for listening, and thanks for doing your cause!

  2. John Stewart says:

    Most men in the world are not that good at seducing women. Part of their problem is that they don’t look at women as people, but as merely sexual objects. So, they don’t even begin to understand the fear, embarrasment, and rage that sexual comments or looks create in women.

    Insecure men do this. Loser men do this.

    Normal men understand that a woman deserves the same respect that men demand for themselves.

    This behavior makes you wonder what these men were taught by their mothers.

    It’s sad, really, that innocent women need to deal with this everyday.

  3. Kaz Hawrylak says:

    I’ve been surrounded by proper culture all my life. I also, as a man, come from a very difficult background emotionally. When men understand on our own terms, in a societal sense, we get it. This site is imperative. Absolutely as a learner. I’ve always felt like that, and I didn’t face it with guys because we’re purposefully very neurotic for all the wrong reasons if we don’t face it. I feel a lot, and deal with it. Awesome concept,


  4. This is an unfortunate side effect of the conditioning that goes on in today’s society. The projected images of men and women are very far from real. As a result, most men have no clue how to treat women and women aren’t sure how they want to be treated. There’s still a subconscious conditioning that attracts them to the dickhead types and most men will replicate this because they see it getting results. It makes it unfair to the legit guys trying to deal with women who are confused and defensive towards all men.

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